From my blog, 10/25/11: http://selketkitty.livejournal.com/86106.html

Take three, deep breaths. The first breath relaxes your body. The second breath relaxes your mind and heart. The third breath relaxes your soul.

In the center of your body, in your solar plexus, there is a spark. That spark is not only your center, but your spirit. When you connect to your center, and sink into it, you are more your true self than at any other time, and when you connect your own central axis, which runs from the crown chakra to the root chakra through the solar plexus, to the core of the universe and the center of the Earth, you are more than just grounded, you are whole. Sink, now, into your spark. See that, with every inhalation, that spark expands. With every exhalation, your spark becomes more connected to earth and sky. You breathe, in and out, and become, with every lungful of air, more and more a pillar of fiery light. Your stomach and spine become bright and fiery. Your chest and back become bright fire. Your womb and root become bright fire. Your neck and shoulders become bright fire. Your waist and hips become bright fire. Your arms become bright fire. Your legs become bright fire. Your hands and feet become bright fire. Your head becomes bright fire. You become a column that sinks into the earth, and rises into the sky, an inferno of power connecting earth and sky with your own bright spark, perfectly balanced between the two sources of heat, light and creation. With one final deep breath, you draw into your center the source of galaxies in the interior of the universe, and the magma at the heart of the earth, and with the speed of a falling meteor, you plunge your transformed self towards the earth like a strike of lightening.

When you hit, there is a back-draft upwards, and you find your fiery self transformed and contained. You find yourself a salamander, well-fed, but enclosed by brick, mortar, and metal – but you are the heart of fire, and you know that fuel is fuel, and that a moment’s distraction can set you free to roam, so you are content. You mumble and crackle, pop and snicker to yourself, singing the siren song of flame as you dance along the wood you find yourself devouring. However, you are the essence of transformation, and it is not in your nature to remain in one form for long, so with another deep breath, you begin to gather yourself, simmering down deep into the coals, where you take a new form – one that can walk the earth without harm – a glowingly illuminated spirit, cracking as it moves to flash the fiery magma within, but which contains the heat and does no damage.

When you are fully-formed and completely contained, you arise out of the space you find yourself in, and know its human name – a fireplace. You step down out of the enclosure, and look around you. You see those of your brothers and sisters who remain within the hearth, and notice above the fireside mantle a number of yellowing beeswax candles. Not wanting to explore alone, you take one of the candles down, and, reaching back into the grate, draw out a flame with which to light the candle from the coals within. When you feel ready, and the flicker of the candlelight becomes steady, you turn to examine the room. Much of what you see is curious, but you do not understand what you are looking at, and so you pass it by. Only one thing captures your passion and rebellious curiosity, and that object is a closed door with a faint aura of secrecy about it. You know instinctively that the owner of the fireplace seldom examines what lies beyond the door, and your burning inquisitiveness immediately demands that you not only open it, but examine the environs beyond. You take up your candle, and stride across the room, stubbornly courageous in these strange surroundings, and determined to discover the mystery.

Not being one to let closed doors stand, when you arrive at the threshold and find it to be only wood, you raise your fist and pound brashly, three times, upon the door. The protesting exit, knowing what’s good for it, obligingly unlocks, and springs open before you, and you discover on the other side a black pit of darkness so deep that it absorbs the light you and your candle produce, swallowing it into the depths below – and it IS below, for the only thing your candle is able to enlighten is a single stair, triangular in shape, wide on the right side and narrow on the left. You take a deep breath and summon a flare of light, but the illumination sinks into the darkness, and tells you nothing more. Valiantly, you settle yourself, and decide to forge onward. You step onto the stair.

Immediately, another stair, slightly to the left of the one you inhabit, appears below the first… and now you know that you stand upon a spiral stairway. The nature of the stairway is to flow counterclockwise downward, and the case is rickety, wooden, creaky, and steep. Were you not intrepidly natured, your heart might quail at the sharpness of the incline, but being fiery and fearless you barely blink, and continue. Instinctively, you know the number of the stairs, and while only one tread is ever lit by your candle at a time, you hear the count flowing backwards as you traverse the case – 13, 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and then you find yourself standing upon the earth, deep in the swallowing darkness.

You look about you, and discover that in front of you on the floor is another yellowing beeswax candle. Wanting to see more of the surrounding room, you immediately attempt to lift the candle from the ground, but discover it to be affixed to the dirt floor, and settle for sharing the flame of your own candle with its wick. As you cast about eagerly, you find that the darkness is still nearly complete, but you also discover another candle, to the left of the second. You step towards it, and light it. To your right appears a third candle, and when you light that one, you find a fourth, again to the right of it… and when you light that one, you discover a spear for the candle in your hand to the right of it. When you have placed your own candle down, you discover that within the circle of candles, you can see quite well, and what you see is the source of the darkness.

Cast out from your body, in a pool contained by the lights of the candles, is a deep, dark shadow. It emanates from within you, and is contained by the structure you built of light, and when you are not guarding it with the meager light of a single candle, it reigns supreme, here in the depths of your subconscious, the basement level of your spiritual house.

The moment you know it for what it is, the moment your flash of understanding illuminates the true nature of things, the lights come on in the room. The shadow pooling before you gathers, stands upright, and takes your own form, a fetch, a doppelganger, a mirror image. You see your own hair, your own eyes, and your own skin. You see your own height, your own waist, your own shape… and in recognizing yourself, you pause. It’s so like yourself that the face wrinkles just the way yours does, the lips purse just like your own, when you are about to speak. Curiously, boldly even, you wait to see what it will say to you, and when it does begin to speak, your fetch tells you something about yourself that only you have ever known. It does not waste words on idle gossip, on falsehood, on fears or self-deception, however, as one would expect of a shadow – and you know you are hearing the unvarnished, unquestionable truth. It is a hard thing, to hear bald truth spoken in so absolute a way as to be undeniable, but you are here for a reason. You are here to grow forwards, to be true to yourself, and bring yourself into balance by courageously accepting that truth, however ugly, requires action. Your shadow asks you: “Can you be a bold enough a leader to take a stand? Can you act on what you learn here? Are you willing to leave your comfort zone, and use the power of your individuality to live a new life from here on out, based on the truth you hear spoken here?”

When you are ready, and feel capable of choosing to act, step forward, and take your shadow’s hand. Bring yourself into balance, with the power of a true decision, acting with your true will to alter the path you will walk from now on.

With the choice made, your shadow flares, brighter than the sun, illuminated by your decision. The flames from the four candles are swallowed by the light produced within your shadow, as it absorbs the flames produced by their wicking. You take your fetch by the hand again, and leaving the now-quiescent flameless candles behind you, you walk back up the stairs, counting as you go – 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13… You walk with your doppelganger out the door, back to the fireplace, where you find a warm welcome from your fiery brethren in the grate. Taking your shadow back into yourself, you allow yourself to return back to the fire, whole and happy.

You take three, deep breaths. The first breath awakens your soul. The second breath awakens your heart and mind. The third breath awakens your body. You open your eyes, and smile.

sweet thanks