When "You" Just Can't Take Life Anymore - A topic on Suicide

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lori67k
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When "You" Just Can't Take Life Anymore - A topic on Suicide

Postby lori67k » Wed Aug 02, 2017 8:57 pm

I felt compelled to address a sensitive topic today, what with all the suicides taking place across the globe, some making national headlines where stars in the entertainment industry took their lives recently, even our children indulging in suicide pacts; has taken the world (both) by surprise and (unfortunately) by storm... Sadly, suicide has become an unfortunate epidemic in this new century

Many people have different opinions about this; some are angry and confused because they simply cannot understand what would drive someone to do such a thing (mainly because suicide has never touched their lives on a personal note), some egg others on to end their lives, many mourn and are also confused and even angry when someone they love takes that forever scarring action of taking their lives not realizing the devastation (and legacy) they leave behind and then there are those, suffering silently and contemplating suicide themselves; also for various reasons.

I am not here to judge. On the contrary! I myself have been on both sides of that coin. I have been the receiver of bad news when a friend took his life many years ago and then I've not only contemplated suicide myself, but actually went through with it 7 times; 4 times I had actually died but through timely intervention of emergency services (and one time being announced and body- bagged then tagged deceased), but if not for Source's divine intervention, I would not be here now to share that part of my story; lending you the indication as to why this topic feels so important for me to address and share with you all, here.

People contemplate, go through with it (whether they were/are unsuccessful or successful when committing suicide) for many, many reasons... It could be a bad break-up, being angry at the world, feeling alone, isolated, unworthy, like they don't belong and/or feeling frustrated because life and time doesn't ever seem to change; it could be drug and/or alcohol related, abuse related and even health related; it can be a culmination of things, but whatever that individual's reasons are, whatever circumstances they may be facing that is/was causing them to contemplate suicide; it always because they are in pain of some sort that has crippled them emotionally, mentally and most often in their relationships as well or lack thereof. It isn't so much about suicide but about simply ending the pain because it is just too great!... It (their pain) has literally become too unbearable that taking their life seems the only way to end the pain; the pain being the only constant driving force that leaves them feeling beyond ... empty ... but consumed all at the same time

Most of the time, you will hear survivors of those who committed suicide that they never understood the warning signs or saw them until it was too late (an after thought), and this is often for good reason; for even the one following through with suicide isn't even aware of the signs that this is it, they are actually going to do this because for many, they've contemplated doing this for so long, and never actually did the act or they did and failed, but always managed to keep on living but often it is a kind of living that is wrought with insufferable pain and so they suffer in silence and don't even know they are going through with it until they... do.

Warning signs can often prove misleading; for the person who may have been showing 'warning signs' may all of a sudden change before their loved ones eyes, seemingly happy; their lives turning around but then all of a sudden (without any warning) they are gone. Sometimes those happier moments can actually be the trigger; those happier moments can give false hope all because warning signs for suicide is... again... often misleading even for the individual with a history of contemplating (or attempting) suicide.

Not too long ago, we had a beloved member here; take their own life. It was after hearing this news that many of us realized that the member was actually crying out for help, but because when each of us are in pain and inner turmoil, we can often act out in ways that may cause friction, and possibly confusion with others, or they may isolate themselves, it is so easy to misread these signs, to simply dismiss these behaviors as someone being angry or inconsiderate or argumentative, even delusional, and so on; it easy to understand why we might miss those signs as possibly being something more... far more. Until it is too late

Even if we see the signs, many of us feel helpless and don't know how to help, or the person feeling suicidal pushes against and away from those trying to be there, trying to understand

The reason I am posting this, is to share some (much learned, the hard way) wisdom I've gathered regarding this sensitive topic in hopes to help those who may be faced with someone they know committing suicide and even those contemplating it, with a few (helpful) key things to remember

1. It is very important not to judge or blame the person (or yourself if you are feeling suicidal) who is feeling this way. Suicide is the destination; the closing act; the way to make something causing someone so much turmoil and agony, go away, to make being at peace finite. It is not a solution though, as it leaves many, many scars for those who become suicide survivors, losing a loved one, the loss for many survivors too great to comprehend.

Suicide and depression often inflicts internalizers; people who tend to internalize their pain, experiences, even those of others they know and of those they don't know, which is why watching the news can often prove detrimental to an internalizer because those negative events are constantly being absorbed by internalizers on a greater degree than others who simply want to be informed.

Reserve judgment for those things where judgment really serves a good purpose; reserve blame for only those things you can do something about and change. Do your best to understand that your pain, your anger or disgust becomes their pain, their anger, their disgust. If you know someone feeling this way, offer your support but don't criticize or lecture; it only makes them feel worse; show compassion and just be supportive instead

2. Don't make it your problem. Don't make this about you. In other words, it is the person dealing with such pain to the degree they are contemplating ending it all that can benefit from your support but should you hit a brick wall; don't go off on a tangent about them being selfish or condemn them because then you make it about you rather than helping them to get to the root of their issue and to find more healthy and positive resolutions so hopefully they can breathe (within) and relax a bit and learn to enjoy and appreciate their lives, and perhaps be able to begin seeing challenges as opportunities. When you make it all about you, you are robbing them their right to feel what they feel; to learn and grow; you are denying them of who they are and of whom they can be

3. Don't Watch them like a hawk. Everyone needs their personal space sometimes. Even though you may simply be just trying to help; invading a depressed and/or suicidal persons space reads loud and clear the distrust factor and only makes that person feel even more worthless, depressed and even angry. A suicidal or depressed person is most likely feeling this way as a result of internalizing everything that has either happened to them or around them; when the distrust factor comes in play; they internalize that too. It is from personal experience that you never want to mix anger with depression, it often leads to more unhealthy belief systems and can often have deadly consequences

4. Don't make (or take) it personally. We simply cannot fix everything and certainly we cannot fix everyone; nor should we try to "fix" anyone. We can only be responsible for ourselves. Be supportive; listen, be the shoulder they may need to cry on, but never take it personally, never internalize their struggles for it only amplifies those energies and actually lends support to NO ONE. Get them help when and where you can but don't ever force it upon them; this only delays the desire. If someone really wants to end it all; there is nothing you can do about it.

Below is the number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

The mass suicides that has been going on around globe is sad and devastating, especially for those left behind. If you are feeling suicidal, consider the damage losing you in this way can cause. This final act is irreversible. Once you're gone; you're gone. There is no turning back. We are each here for a reason. We were created in love. We were created because we are meant to be.

I know that from where you might be sitting right now, things may look incomprehensibly bleak; that things will never change... But, trust me when I say, things do change, all the time. the moment you just had will never be the same moment again. I encourage you to keep fighting and trust that these burdens will lighten up eventually but only if you remain in the fight; because you do have purpose. You absolutely do matter!

but most importantly, don't suffer in silence anymore, go speak with someone. If you're concerned you might get locked up or something else, should you share the dark with someone; know that there is help out there to get you through the now so you can then go get some long term help without the fear of being stowed away somewhere for your own safety. And... you can get immediate help anonymously.

You can always call your local Suicide Prevention Hotline/Lifeline or you can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline and keep your anonymity. Your details would only be dispatched to 911 in the case of extreme situations. Their goal is to help talk you down through listening. The simple act of listening is quite a powerful tool and they are very good at listening and providing you the support you might need

The suicide prevention hotlines are not just for those contemplating suicide either. They can also lend support to those who have someone near and dear to them who is contemplating suicide or in a deep depressive state and help guide you on how best to handle the situation that is positive and healing for you both. This includes those who lost someone to suicide. I know because it was the national lifeline I called after my friend ended his life. They helped me understand the various stages of grief and gave me guidance on how best to work through those stages; grief is not something we can (nor should) avoid; it is always best to work through it and all 5 stages to the best of our ability.

IF YOU (OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW) IS STRUGGLING WITH DEPRESSION AND FEELING SUICIDAL, PLEASE CONTACT THE
NATIONAL SUICIDE PREVENTION LIFELINE AT:
1-800-273-8255

or text:
TALK to 741741 to talk or text with a trained Crisis Counselor

To learn more on how you can stop a suicide; go to:
http://www.AFSP.org

Remember this... <3

SMILES ARE CONTAGIOUS! 1s GO INFECT SOMEONE NOW 1s
HUG SOMEONE TODAY ...OR... HUG YOURSELF <3 AND KNOW YOU ARE LOVED

Sending love and blessings to you all 1ht


Whenever we try to live up to other's expectations and perceptions of how they think we should be, look like, act like, become... we are only setting ourselves up to fail miserably! In the end, no one is happy. Please yourself first, love yourself most, seek out only those things that make 'you' feel good, those things that lend you many moments of peace; live your truth and be who you are. Only you are the true source of your own happiness. Make it happen 1ht

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Re: When "You" Just Can't Take Life Anymore - A topic on Suicide

Postby Adelphia » Fri Sep 15, 2017 2:36 am

Thank you for sharing this excellent post.


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"You can call me 'little sunshine'."-Crowley

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lori67k
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Re: When "You" Just Can't Take Life Anymore - A topic on Suicide

Postby lori67k » Fri Sep 15, 2017 3:28 am

My pleasure :) I truly hope it helps; even if it is just one person... a beginning of something new always has to start somewhere <3

Thank you Adelphia

Blessings 1ht


Whenever we try to live up to other's expectations and perceptions of how they think we should be, look like, act like, become... we are only setting ourselves up to fail miserably! In the end, no one is happy. Please yourself first, love yourself most, seek out only those things that make 'you' feel good, those things that lend you many moments of peace; live your truth and be who you are. Only you are the true source of your own happiness. Make it happen 1ht

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Re: When "You" Just Can't Take Life Anymore - A topic on Suicide

Postby Zarine » Fri Sep 15, 2017 10:39 pm

Thank you so much for posting this! 1hg

A close friend of mine tried to hang herself when life got too much. She was in an abusive relationship, when the abuser left my friend for someone else they continued to throw abuse her way. Kept throwing insults, telling her she was ugly, and told her to kill herself.
She tried, all her friends were reaching out to her. Called the police, and they saved my friend's life before she breathed her last breath.

Now she is in a much happier relationship, moved far away from the abuser, got a new job and is closer to all her friends.

Much love and light to everyone! <3 :hug:


My spirits are my guides, friends and family~ I love them all! :D
I'm so happy they chose to bless my life the way that they have!

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lori67k
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Re: When "You" Just Can't Take Life Anymore - A topic on Suicide

Postby lori67k » Fri Sep 15, 2017 10:57 pm

What an amazing story Zarine :) you guys didn't give up on her which helped her to stay in the fight. Not everyone has happy endings so quickly after a failed suicide attempt so her story is very inspiring that no matter how long it might take for one's life to shift toward the positive, never give up! thank you for sharing her story with us here

No one wants to stay fighting through life all the time but if we give up we'll never know what could be. We deserve to live our lives and we always matter.. so thanks again hon for sharing this :)

Big hugs and many blessings 1ht


Whenever we try to live up to other's expectations and perceptions of how they think we should be, look like, act like, become... we are only setting ourselves up to fail miserably! In the end, no one is happy. Please yourself first, love yourself most, seek out only those things that make 'you' feel good, those things that lend you many moments of peace; live your truth and be who you are. Only you are the true source of your own happiness. Make it happen 1ht

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Re: When "You" Just Can't Take Life Anymore - A topic on Suicide

Postby Zarine » Sat Sep 16, 2017 8:03 pm

Awww!

You're totally welcome, lori67k! This topic of yours really inspired me to share, and I feel that it's important for people to know that friendship is mega important! :D :hug: That no matter the pit a person has fallen in, there are always people who care, everyone is beautiful! <3

Big hugs, and many blessings to you too! 1ht


My spirits are my guides, friends and family~ I love them all! :D
I'm so happy they chose to bless my life the way that they have!

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lori67k
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Re: When "You" Just Can't Take Life Anymore - A topic on Suicide

Postby lori67k » Sun Sep 17, 2017 8:37 pm

Awww, the same for you hon 1d Thank you 1ht


Whenever we try to live up to other's expectations and perceptions of how they think we should be, look like, act like, become... we are only setting ourselves up to fail miserably! In the end, no one is happy. Please yourself first, love yourself most, seek out only those things that make 'you' feel good, those things that lend you many moments of peace; live your truth and be who you are. Only you are the true source of your own happiness. Make it happen 1ht


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