Article - Faery Taboos #1: Saying Thank You

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Personally I don’t like when people say thank you either. The words thank you do not necessarily mean that you are grateful they are simply words. There is a difference between claiming that you are grateful and showing your gratitude. It is my opinion that they would rather us show our gratitude then say it and I agree with them completely.


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I think the last reason given in the article is very probable: "It is also possible that saying thank you, or overtly acknowledging what They have done for you, is problematic because they prefer not to have that sort of attention or focus on themselves."

There are quite a few stories of Fae giving gifts to humans with the condition that the human must never tell anyone about it.


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Alys-RaccoonReadings wrote: Fri Feb 02, 2018 3:45 am Super interesting article pondering why one should not say "thank you" to the fair folk.

http://lairbhan.blogspot.com/2018/01/fa ... k-you.html

From the author:
I have to be honest, I don't remember where I learned this one. I have wracked my brain but I can't remember where I may have read it or who might have told me about it originally. As far back as I can remember it has just been a rule I lived by: you speak politely and you never say thank you. When I initially tried to track down where I'd heard it and came up empty I started to wonder if I'd made it up, however further research did provide some validation.

Why is this a taboo? It is hard to say as folklore offers no clear explanation, but we can offer a few suggestions.
I know this is an old post, but I thought I'd reinvigorate it a bit and add another source. Morgan Daimler also mentions why you should never say thank you to the fae and backs up some of the points made in the original post in this thread:

She writes on page 33 of Travelling the Fairy Path:
"...it is a widespread belief, although not ubiquitous, that one shouldn't say thank you to the fairies. I have heard one theory behind this, that it implies a debt to them, a blank cheque if you will, that would allow them to decide how to repay them. This is somewhat supported by the etymology of the phrase 'thank you' which is rooted in the concepts of gratitude and obligation. (Harper, D., 2017) Another theory suggests it is dismissive and implies you feel superior to them. Whatever is the case you should avoid saying it. Offering a gift in exchange for something you feel you've received can be a good idea, or saying something else along the lines of expressing gratitude for what happened without saying thank you directly, such as 'I am so happy with...' or 'I really appreciate...'.


“To be sure, I am a forest, and a night of dark trees: but he who is not afraid of my darkness, will find banks full of roses under my cypresses.”
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I have faeries and I have thanked my faeries numerous times. I thought its okay with FAE companions to be thankful. Is there’s anymore taboos that I need to know about? Which FAE type that’s gets angered? How can I resolve this?


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There a few fae in my keep from both CH and MMT; they have all told me that "thank-you" is not a word that they appreciate. However, when asked about the nature offerings that I give them, they do like those.


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Hm I dunno.. I say thank you to my faires and they don't mind at all. I've asked them about it and they tell me that there are some kinds of faeries who have a different "culture" than them, who might not like it. But mine are "cool" with it.


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0x. After reading (at least) the majority of everyone's posts, here's the conclusion I've come to, which I think sums it up.

8*8 When it comes to expressing gratitude to Fae: Show Instead of Tell. With the possible exception of expressing your gratitude by saying how Their favour, or actions, made you feel.8*8

That being said, I found the more detailed posts here very helpful!

Now, what exactly is a Faery? Or, perhaps the proper question is, what qualities does a Spirit need to possess in order to be considered a Fae? 0x.

::bump::


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I thank every one of my companions individually as often as I can, these include my fae, djinns, and Immortals and none of them were insulted nor have they told me not too. It's my belief that each spirit companion is different as an individual. So while Fae as a species for example might not like being thanked for instance, perhaps some of them within their species don't mind.

With that being said however, that is my opinion & others may have a different opinion than mine which of course is okay too. I'm just talking about my spirit family in particular & what happens when I thank them.

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VanNocturne wrote: Sat May 27, 2023 6:30 pm 0x. After reading (at least) the majority of everyone's posts, here's the conclusion I've come to, which I think sums it up.

8*8 When it comes to expressing gratitude to Fae: Show Instead of Tell. With the possible exception of expressing your gratitude by saying how Their favour, or actions, made you feel.8*8

That being said, I found the more detailed posts here very helpful!

Now, what exactly is a Faery? Or, perhaps the proper question is, what qualities does a Spirit need to possess in order to be considered a Fae? 0x.

::bump::
Thanking your Faes verbally isn't taboo, but it's not always their preferred method of appreciation. It's not just a matter of one's personality, it's a collective issue that affects an entire race. Let's acknowledge that this problem is not exclusive to certain individuals. Some may act like it's no big deal, but that doesn't mean they actually enjoy it. It's kind of like that friend who makes a sexist joke about you - everyone knows it's not okay, but they keep doing it anyway. Don't be that friend! Have you ever thought that just because someone doesn't react to an insult, it doesn't mean the insult is acceptable?

While I rarely say "thank you" to my Faes as an inside joke, there are other ways to express gratitude that may be more appreciated. A Fae is simply the race that they were born into, much like we were born into the human race in this lifetime. So let's be considerate in how we show our appreciation to our Faes.


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Hey there, With all due respect I don't believe that saying thank you to Fae is a collective issue for their species at all & regardless I do what they as individual's prefer because each of my beautiful companions promised me if they ever had any problem to tell me, so until then I will still continue to thank them as they prefer & if I'm asked to stop by any of them, I shall.

While our companions belong to species just as we as humans do, some things not being acceptable to a species just might be fine to an individual companion & as a Keeper I only focus on those I adopt into my spirit family while still researching species information for abilities etc also.

We are all different with different beliefs, what works best for one person may not for another and that's okay. We all have choice in doing what we believe is best for ourselves & our spirit families even if those choices aren't something thats standard for a species, it can still show respect for your companions regardless which is the important thing in my opinion.

\:*





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