ninjalovergirl wrote:Did anyone just see those last few pages (and also other digs at me), and that, by actually coming out and talking about it, instead of ignoring it and still having the tension still present, it solved the tension and arguments between people? Instead of just leaving it be, and being tense, and not knowing why? In other words, by digging up the past, it worked.

I am one who believes that one should act in the moment to resolve things, rather than waiting for them to culminate and bring everything to the fore at once --which can in turn be problematic in and of itself.

Most issues have been dealt with as they come up, which is why they are in the past. Many things have actually been resolved, and to refer to them as a collective is faulty. To bring forth negative examples of the past which have been addressed, doesn't do much but to keep us in the past..and what we want to do is move forward.
So if you're talking recent issues, certainly, it makes sense..but even so, I am of the view they should be dealt with directly, individually, head on to make an example. Lead by example. An announcement like this is fine and well, but the changes come from action and more people respond to action. I know there is good intent behind this post, but I don't feel it is the most active solution to the issues you perceive.

Just go forward and put to practice what you're preaching, this stimulates positive growth.

There have been calls for peace before by many members here; and I as well as others have talked about the nature of opinions.
As I've stated, this has not been neglected..there is no avoidance of negativity. We as a forum have worked through these instances numerous times. If they hadn't been worked through, there wouldn't be the overall positive experience most are actually having; there wouldn't have been advancement in any sense.

I am not discounting the perceptions of those who may feel negatively about where the forum is at, as you must feel that way for a reason; but I do think that it's more personal rather than this widespread issue.
I think that individuals, such as yourself ninjalover, must be feeling mistreated..and certainly that must be gotten to the bottom of..but I would not say CH is a mess, I would not say CH is in a bad state.
I think these views are the result of a few individually bad experiences that paint all surrounding in the same negative light, when they could likely have been alleviated if a greater awareness and understanding from all directions was achieved -- of how each individual feels, and the nature of all contributing aspects. And I think those individuals need to speak up at the time they feel they are being wronged; this should be encouraged.

ninjalovergirl wrote:You cannot ignore the past, it is still on this board, and in every member here.
It still lingers, even I could feel it, but didn't understand it. It just felt horrible. Not somewhere that is easy to be.

CH is supposed to be a place where I feel safe, can come and relax, but it isn't even close, and isn't even over. You cannot just say this is the internet, it is dismissing the problems that were never there before. if it was a better place before, there is a lot of room for improvement, and I am trying to help. But if you don't even want to try to understand the concerns of others here, form a different point of view to your own, then so be it. I am saying it now, it's totally different, and not a step in the right direction.

I'm not ignoring the past; I'm simply not letting it rule my life. Everyone has to move on and deal with the present. And if something of the past is still causing an issue in the present, it should be rather obvious. This isn't obvious to everybody, so everybody does not feel the way that you do; and therefore it is not a problem for the entire community.

You want CH to be a place where you can relax. And that is fine, many people like CH for it's friendly and comforting atmosphere.. but conflict is everywhere. That it turns up here is just life. There are many rules/guidelines in place to combat damage in this community, but that conflict comes up at all is completely natural when you are allowing people from all walks of life to freely express themselves in coexistence.

I do not see how I am dismissing any problems. I don't see the problems you do. Rather, you may be dismissing the role that technology plays in these problems in reacting so to my statement. I think all factors are important to consider, in coming to a more complete understanding of why things are the way they are.

I think I'm pretty open to the concerns of others. I think I've been here a long time, and I have been consistently active, and I have taken action to mediate and alleviate the issues that arise. I care about the community and invest a lot of myself into keeping this place going in the right direction, as well as evolving. So do others here.
I find it increasingly offensive that you appear to be choosing to believe that nobody cares or is doing anything of worth, just because they don't feel quite as you do.
And it's pretty clear in my response above, that I do care about your concerns and anyone else who may be having a bad experience on the forum.

My final point is; many of us are and have been actively working to shape this place, to keep it at it's best for the era we are in. Some aspects are out of our hands; relative perception is out of our hands; and this can mean negativity arises every so often..but it's a hell of a lot better than you'll find at any other forum and that much is always maintained.
That it is maintained, takes a lot of care on the part of the owners, mods, and passionate members of the board. This forum is not going downhill; there are changes in the atmosphere but they are neutral -- you must take responsibility for your own experience, and outlook, just as much as any of us can do what is in our power to be welcoming and make sure your rights are respected.


That is all I will say on this matter.

Illeana3 wrote:Ninja, How many forums have you belonged to where you've been an active poster? Because I'm sure you've noticed, not everyone is friends with everyone on these forums. Creepy Hollows is most probably THE most tolerent community I've been involved with. No real major long lasting flame throwing fests. When I bred dogs I belonged to a particular community for 6 years. IT WAS BRUTAL!! Elitist AKC show people are some of the most cold and calculating people on this planet, I swear! People came, people went...most lasted about a year before the nastiness got to be too much.
The point is....you can care for CH and the people, but if someone wants to just be quiet and not make waves or rehash past injustice, that's OK. All I can say, forum "moods" come in waves, if you don't like the current mood, sit back and relax, it will change. :grouphug:

A few. Hated them, apart form IMDB and CH. This forum is starting to feel like them. Not a nice place to be at the moment.

And it is tolerant, but only when it isn't controversial to this particular forum. Before it still had it's problems, but not like this. I am saying that it's OK for people to be quiet and not make waves if they want to, but it isn't OK for them to not want to do it because they don't feel safe, are scared to voice them. There is a difference. And it happens here. More than it did before. But I shouldn't have to stay off of CH for a few years just so people can eventually be peaceful to one another. It actually would help if they had help to understand this too. Because then some big changes can happen. Positive ones, become closer, as everyone would work together, not against each other until they eventually realize it isn't good to do so, as it is causing a lot of negativity, because they are doing something they shouldn't. Being negative to fellow CH members, instead of working together.

I still don't think people understand what I am saying. It isn't a case of just getting thicker skin (which wouldn't be nice to say to any empaths anyway). It's not understanding anyway. It's still dismissing the problems that never existed to this amount, until now.

It is a case of other people not seeing the problems fully, so think everything is OK, because they are OK. When if fact, not everyone is, and usually goes two ways, they stay quiet and don't get into it as they don't want to cause more trouble, or they don't last long enough to pipe up about it. Not everything is on the surface. I am trying to bring it up to show everyone. In fact, I am a good example. I will not stick around if this continues. Because it is around. And no one has really said much about this before, because they can't. I care for CH a lot, so I am doing it. I have a lot of evidence in this thread of it going on with others as well. Not just me. Please see it for what it is.

NoctemAeternus wrote:

ninjalovergirl wrote:Did anyone just see those last few pages (and also other digs at me), and that, by actually coming out and talking about it, instead of ignoring it and still having the tension still present, it solved the tension and arguments between people? Instead of just leaving it be, and being tense, and not knowing why? In other words, by digging up the past, it worked.

I am one who believes that one should act in the moment to resolve things, rather than waiting for them to culminate and bring everything to the fore at once --which can in turn be problematic in and of itself.

Most issues have been dealt with as they come up, which is why they are in the past. Many things have actually been resolved, and to refer to them as a collective is faulty. To bring forth negative examples of the past which have been addressed, doesn't do much but to keep us in the past..and what we want to do is move forward.
So if you're talking recent issues, certainly, it makes sense..but even so, I am of the view they should be dealt with directly, individually, head on to make an example. Lead by example. An announcement like this is fine and well, but the changes come from action and more people respond to action. I know there is good intent behind this post, but I don't feel it is the most active solution to the issues you perceive.

Just go forward and put to practice what you're preaching, this stimulates positive growth.

There have been calls for peace before by many members here; and I as well as others have talked about the nature of opinions.
As I've stated, this has not been neglected..there is no avoidance of negativity. We as a forum have worked through these instances numerous times. If they hadn't been worked through, there wouldn't be the overall positive experience most are actually having; there wouldn't have been advancement in any sense.

I am not discounting the perceptions of those who may feel negatively about where the forum is at, as you must feel that way for a reason; but I do think that it's more personal rather than this widespread issue.
I think that individuals, such as yourself ninjalover, must be feeling mistreated..and certainly that must be gotten to the bottom of..but I would not say CH is a mess, I would not say CH is in a bad state.
I think these views are the result of a few individually bad experiences that paint all surrounding in the same negative light, when they could likely have been alleviated if a greater awareness and understanding from all directions was achieved -- of how each individual feels, and the nature of all contributing aspects. And I think those individuals need to speak up at the time they feel they are being wronged; this should be encouraged.

ninjalovergirl wrote:You cannot ignore the past, it is still on this board, and in every member here.
It still lingers, even I could feel it, but didn't understand it. It just felt horrible. Not somewhere that is easy to be.

CH is supposed to be a place where I feel safe, can come and relax, but it isn't even close, and isn't even over. You cannot just say this is the internet, it is dismissing the problems that were never there before. if it was a better place before, there is a lot of room for improvement, and I am trying to help. But if you don't even want to try to understand the concerns of others here, form a different point of view to your own, then so be it. I am saying it now, it's totally different, and not a step in the right direction.

I'm not ignoring the past; I'm simply not letting it rule my life. Everyone has to move on and deal with the present. And if something of the past is still causing an issue in the present, it should be rather obvious. This isn't obvious to everybody, so everybody does not feel the way that you do; and therefore it is not a problem for the entire community.

You want CH to be a place where you can relax. And that is fine, many people like CH for it's friendly and comforting atmosphere.. but conflict is everywhere. That it turns up here is just life. There are many rules/guidelines in place to combat damage in this community, but that conflict comes up at all is completely natural when you are allowing people from all walks of life to freely express themselves in coexistence.

I do not see how I am dismissing any problems. I don't see the problems you do. Rather, you may be dismissing the role that technology plays in these problems in reacting so to my statement. I think all factors are important to consider, in coming to a more complete understanding of why things are the way they are.

I think I'm pretty open to the concerns of others. I think I've been here a long time, and I have been consistently active, and I have taken action to mediate and alleviate the issues that arise. I care about the community and invest a lot of myself into keeping this place going in the right direction, as well as evolving. So do others here.
I find it increasingly offensive that you appear to be choosing to believe that nobody cares or is doing anything of worth, just because they don't feel quite as you do.
And it's pretty clear in my response above, that I do care about your concerns and anyone else who may be having a bad experience on the forum.

My final point is; many of us are and have been actively working to shape this place, to keep it at it's best for the era we are in. Some aspects are out of our hands; relative perception is out of our hands; and this can mean negativity arises every so often..but it's a hell of a lot better than you'll find at any other forum and that much is always maintained.
That it is maintained, takes a lot of care on the part of the owners, mods, and passionate members of the board. This forum is not going downhill; there are changes in the atmosphere but they are neutral -- you must take responsibility for your own experience, and outlook, just as much as any of us can do what is in our power to be welcoming and make sure your rights are respected.


That is all I will say on this matter.

As to keeping in the past, when issues are not resolved because things do still linger in the past, the past has to be dug up and dealt with in order for things to move on in a positive way. It isn't resolved when people are still doing it because of the stress of the last few years, whether in their own lives, and/or on CH.

When the past is still around for everyone to see, it will rule peoples lives because they do not understand it. That is what I felt. It is around. I can see it from your way, and understand you just want the next part of your life to come. But that isn't the way it is going here, at least, from how I see it. It is moving slowly, but not healing properly. If people talked about it more, about everything, all the negativity, and tried to group plan a strategy to help deal with it better, to feel like everyone is doing the same thing, to help out, they would feel a lot better. To comfort each other, to know that this will help move to a new direction. As I do still feel it around. And it isn't something that a lot of people can take right now. So they just try to get it past them. Not try to deal with the unresolved issues, which however much you want it to be gone, are still around.

Again, I said nobody cares, because people are ignoring this part of it. You may be helping in different ways, I believe that, totally (it would have helped if you said you were a mod, as I didn't know that, good luck with it) but not this way. This is helping in a different way, to problems that not everyone sees properly. I am trying to heal the members by getting them together. To see from their perspectives, so as to see new problems that I have and haven't seen. As this problem is causing other problems too.

I did not meant to offend you, but you did dismiss my own concerns about this, no one says anything about this (I have not seen anything), no one actively does anything out in the open about this, from what i have seen anyway. As such, things feel like they are dismissed, not involved with, as people still feel that way about them. I am trying to get them together, so these problems are not dismissed, as they will all talk about them, the unresolved issues that they still face, but do not say. So I am sorry about that. But I feel these are issues that need to be dealt with as they are important and need to be seen by others also. To see that CH is trying to help with their concerns about this. Because no one knows. It's hidden. As such, they can stick it out if they understand what everyone is trying to do. This is one of them. However, I will not be doing this any more since you don't want me to. People will have to deal with the problems themselves, instead of getting together. I cannot help them if you will not let me.

You cannot deny that there are still problems. I didn't even understand but I felt it. That is evidence enough to try to do something about it, just talk sometimes.

Great post!!!

We may not all agree and we may terribly disagree, but this is home and though it is not always accepting it is always welcoming...

There is mercy here,
Understanding and forgiveness....

Together
We just move forward,
We must move forward...

Lets move forward together 2cents

Ninjalovergirl, you think we needn't be guarded and we should feel safe to state our opinions here? I normally don't get involved with the more controversial threads, not because I'm too intimidated to post, or because I'm letting someone else control me, but because my son broke my computer and until I have the chance to replace it I have to rely on an ipad or phone and that makes it very difficult to make lengthy posts. But I'll make an exception now & here's my 2 cents worth. And I'll be blunt. And direct. This thread starts with something so close to bullying that if you did it where I work, you would be counselled. And it is still coming from your posts 6 pages later. And now you're threatening that if we don't stop the behaviour that in fact you are actually doing; you will leave again. You have made it quite clear that you don't like it when other people don't agree with you and just about every post of yours on this thread has made various statements to that effect. You have offended me quite a bit actually, which is something that is very hard to do under normal circumstances. And until now, I don't think we've met on any other threads, so at least from my point of view, it's not personal.

Ninjalovergirl, I don't see a lot of negativity or harshness here. Nor a lot of bashing. I don't agree that there is a problem with that at all. If someone does not agree with someone else, sometimes it does get a bit heated, but that is normal. It happens in families all over the world. That is what we are, a huge world-wide family of spirit keepers and collectors of the paranormal. Some of us can be open about our interests in the 'real' world and some of us have to hide them because it is not understood out there. But we have each other and generally all is well unless you mention demons and then all hell breaks loose. LOL! But that is just because the members here care about each other and are trying to look out for each other. You don't need to try to force your views on the rest of us; we are capable of thinking for ourselves. You probably don't realise that is what you are doing, or maybe it would be more correct for me to say that is how it is being perceived by some of us, because I think that in fact you DO know what you're doing. A lot of us don't see there is a problem at all.

You do not appear to realise that this forum has survived and grown quite well in the last couple of years since you were last here, despite the "hostility" that you seem to see everywhere. I can assure you that you can't force people to like each other or agree with each other or even understand each other. Especially in a place like CH which is a community that is truly international. Thanks to people like Noc, Lionox, Terror, Illeana, Huffette, Anna, Aeryn, ShadowSage, Bellatrix, Tinkerbell, Starfire and too many others to name, people who you seem to think haven't been contributing enough, this forum has held together and grown quite well. Apologies to those I've missed, I know there are a lot of names I haven't mentioned! Even some of the newer members contribute a lot [Selquetkitty in particular always has very helpful & informative posts & she has only been here a couple of months.] Sure Magnolia has had to intervene in a couple of threads to keep the peace & bring things back on track and that is pretty much normal, the same sort of thing happens in families out in the real world. From what I hear, on other forums warnings may or may not be given before someone is banned for that sort of behaviour. You do realise don't you that you cannot make people like each other or agree with each other all the time? Some of your statements make it seem as if you don't realise that. But here at CH we are a nice close community. You don't need to start a thread telling us we need something that we already have.

Just my 2 cents worth and that has taken me just over an hour to type. I could say more, I want to but I won't. Just let it go. Stop trying to force people to agree with you when they don't. Stop trying to make people see there is a problem when you seem to be the only one who sees one. You are just spreading the negativity that you say you are trying to stop. Magnolia has already been here telling us enough is enough and so I've already said more than I should. Sorry Magnolia & everyone else.

Jellybean...

Thank you very much for saying what I couldn't quite find the... directness to say. You just became my hero.

Bright blessings...
Selqet

jellybean wrote:Ninjalovergirl, you think we needn't be guarded and we should feel safe to state our opinions here? I normally don't get involved with the more controversial threads, not because I'm too intimidated to post, or because I'm letting someone else control me, but because my son broke my computer and until I have the chance to replace it I have to rely on an ipad or phone and that makes it very difficult to make lengthy posts. But I'll make an exception now & here's my 2 cents worth. And I'll be blunt. And direct. This thread starts with something so close to bullying that if you did it where I work, you would be counselled. And it is still coming from your posts 6 pages later. And now you're threatening that if we don't stop the behaviour that in fact you are actually doing; you will leave again. You have made it quite clear that you don't like it when other people don't agree with you and just about every post of yours on this thread has made various statements to that effect. You have offended me quite a bit actually, which is something that is very hard to do under normal circumstances. And until now, I don't think we've met on any other threads, so at least from my point of view, it's not personal.

Ninjalovergirl, I don't see a lot of negativity or harshness here. Nor a lot of bashing. I don't agree that there is a problem with that at all. If someone does not agree with someone else, sometimes it does get a bit heated, but that is normal. It happens in families all over the world. That is what we are, a huge world-wide family of spirit keepers and collectors of the paranormal. Some of us can be open about our interests in the 'real' world and some of us have to hide them because it is not understood out there. But we have each other and generally all is well unless you mention demons and then all hell breaks loose. LOL! But that is just because the members here care about each other and are trying to look out for each other. You don't need to try to force your views on the rest of us; we are capable of thinking for ourselves. You probably don't realise that is what you are doing, or maybe it would be more correct for me to say that is how it is being perceived by some of us, because I think that in fact you DO know what you're doing. A lot of us don't see there is a problem at all.

You do not appear to realise that this forum has survived and grown quite well in the last couple of years since you were last here, despite the "hostility" that you seem to see everywhere. I can assure you that you can't force people to like each other or agree with each other or even understand each other. Especially in a place like CH which is a community that is truly international. Thanks to people like Noc, Lionox, Terror, Illeana, Huffette, Anna, Aeryn, ShadowSage, Bellatrix, Tinkerbell, Starfire and too many others to name, people who you seem to think haven't been contributing enough, this forum has held together and grown quite well. Apologies to those I've missed, I know there are a lot of names I haven't mentioned! Even some of the newer members contribute a lot [Selquetkitty in particular always has very helpful & informative posts & she has only been here a couple of months.] Sure Magnolia has had to intervene in a couple of threads to keep the peace & bring things back on track and that is pretty much normal, the same sort of thing happens in families out in the real world. From what I hear, on other forums warnings may or may not be given before someone is banned for that sort of behaviour. You do realise don't you that you cannot make people like each other or agree with each other all the time? Some of your statements make it seem as if you don't realise that. But here at CH we are a nice close community. You don't need to start a thread telling us we need something that we already have.

Just my 2 cents worth and that has taken me just over an hour to type. I could say more, I want to but I won't. Just let it go. Stop trying to force people to agree with you when they don't. Stop trying to make people see there is a problem when you seem to be the only one who sees one. You are just spreading the negativity that you say you are trying to stop. Magnolia has already been here telling us enough is enough and so I've already said more than I should. Sorry Magnolia & everyone else.

Bullying? By stating what has been happening to me? Personal experiences? So, by coming out with my own personal experiences and seen others, it is now classed as bullying?

I am actually not threatening. I am saying this is the reason why people do leave. And I will still be on here, just not as much since I cannot take stuff like what you have posted by just sharing my own experiences. I actually just came out and stated what has happened to me, and what I have seen. if just coming out with my own experiences makes you post this, I wonder what bullying is like. I think you shouldn't be the one to say what bullying is like unless you have experienced it for yourself. And this is nothing like it.

Again, because people take my posts the wrong way, for some odd reason, they seem to think it is OK to try to twist what I am actually saying. If you don't understand this cause, fine. Ignore it. But who says I am trying to make people do this? I just thought that it would be simple for people to understand my intentions, since I think everyone wants to try to help CH in some way. In other words, they will help out since they like CH and want it to become more positive.

You have taken my posts and cause way out of proportion. And I really am not threatening, I am actually planning on doing, even before I made this post, since I don't like the way people have lashed out at me, for no reason. Like you are doing. I am actually not having a temper tantrum or anything. I am just saying that the negativity here is something that stresses me out and hurts me too much, so I cannot be around for long periods. How on earth is that threatening? I bet it's not just me who does it.

I am saying I cannot cope with the negativity, what I do with myself is none of CH business, or yours including me not coming on here as often, since I don't want to get into anything like this. No threatening involved. I am just saying that I will not be on here much since this is something I cannot deal with. No bullying or threatening included. Doesn't mean I will stop liking CH, or buying from them. I still will. I am just not getting involved with all this stuff going on if people do not want to try to help out CH in a positive way. Because all this will continue for a long while otherwise. nothing I can cope with. No malicious intentions required. I just stated the truth. It is already hard for me right now. Nothing i can get involved with. Nothing I mean to get involved with either.

If you think that that is threatening CH, then you don't exactly know how i would threaten people. it is not the way I would do it, at all, by targeting CH. Or the members either. I am not like that. I have actually never threatened anyone in my life before, and plan not to. It's not me. I am just stating facts.

and obviously, if you don't like getting into controversial threads just because, this is not for you. Just be glad you have never accidentally made one.

And again, there is a difference between heated topics and bashing/hating on each other/having tension with each other continually/lashing out at each other/spreading negativity etc.
TOTALLY DIFFERENT

How many times do I have to say it? Those things are different to having heated debates.
Why are people not listening to that?

Cannot force. Didn't say that. I said, by working together, they will not WANT to try to take out there anger on other innocents, the other members. Jeez, would you like people to take it out an you? Lash it out on you when you were kind and nice to them? No, I don't think so. You wouldn't be happy with it. Your basically advocating people to be mean to one another instead of trying to work around it as it is a problem, not just something to say "doesn't happen to me, but it just happens here." Again, since you don't understand, heated debates /= hating, bashing, lashing out on others. A healthy debate is good.

I am not against people having heated debates or having their own opinion, and stating it loud and clear. I have said it a million times. I am for it. I am against people being mean to others and lashing out for no reason apart from they are stressed and tense.

I never said people have not been contributing enough DO you want me to make a list of everyone who does help out? That would take a long time. What I am saying is that sometimes people could pipe up and say a lot more, which would help all the newer people. It was to gain morale. Just a comment to help out others. DO NOT HAVE TO DO IT IF THEY DO NOT WANT TO. THEY SHOULD ONLY DO IT IF THEY FEEL LIKE THEY WANT TO, WHEN THEY WANT TO, IT ISN'T GOOD TO BE FORCED TO DO SOMETHING.

I am just saying that I have had things happen and noticed things that can be too much for me and others, and trying to help out.

I don't think you understood what I meant. At all. I am not forcing anyone to do anything. I am saying that i would love it if the CH community got closer and talked about stuff, and tried to all help out and understand what is going on, that everyone is stressed, and so they can understand that they should try not to lash out at others so much, since it is a responsibility to be mature, to help others here who need it. But I see you only targeted me, because I made the thread, when a lot of people agreed with me too. You missed that part.

I am not trying to force anyone to agree with anything. I am making a suggestion since I am one of those people who cannot stay on this forum if it continues like this. And you are one of those people I am talking about who lashed out at me for not understanding what I meant. I am not causing any harm by this. But I cannot deal with the negativity that still haunts this place. It's too much for me to cope with. Too much stress, pain, meanness form others. So I literally cannot stay here. It isn't good for my health right now. I am sure for others either.

This was a plea to get people to come together to stop the negativity, not to stop the heated debates and others opinions, however negative or direct. This isn't about what others think, this is about how others act towards one another. I would prefer it if you didn't bash me for this opinion either. As I am trying to help curb the amount of the negativity that is still present in this forum. And no, that negativity does not come from heated debates. I do not class heated debates and direct opinions as negative. They are positive, actually.

Frater Y.A. wrote:Great post!!!

We may not all agree and we may terribly disagree, but this is home and though it is not always accepting it is always welcoming...

There is mercy here,
Understanding and forgiveness....

Together
We just move forward,
We must move forward...

Lets move forward together 2cents

Thank you Frater. You have no idea how much that means to me.
Move forward together, as we are stronger together. We can all overcome this if we work together, everyone.

Ninja, to be frank, I think the frustration of those responding is that they don't see a problem, and you keep insisting there IS a problem. I was a bit taken aback when I saw your original post as well. I haven't seen any big forum fights, any big drama threads, or any clique wars in a long time.

In my opinion, the majority of the people who come here are capable of coming & posting with little to no interference with their participation. If you're just talking about some members who've left then there's more to the story with some of them, and others (as you've likely seen many "I'm back" threads) go and return at a later date.

As for disagreements, they're unavoidable. If the fear of rejection is enough to make you or anyone else stop posting then that is the true problem, not the person disagreeing with you. A disagreement, or difference of opinion is natural in a group. Disrespect to members is not tolerated though and if a disagreement advances beyond merely that into name calling or belittling then it carries a price of potentially being banned.

Overall though, I think the reason people are disagreeing with you is because they don't see what you see going on here.

creepyhollows wrote:Ninja, to be frank, I think the frustration of those responding is that they don't see a problem, and you keep insisting there IS a problem. I was a bit taken aback when I saw your original post as well. I haven't seen any big forum fights, any big drama threads, or any clique wars in a long time.

In my opinion, the majority of the people who come here are capable of coming & posting with little to no interference with their participation. If you're just talking about some members who've left then there's more to the story with some of them, and others (as you've likely seen many "I'm back" threads) go and return at a later date.

As for disagreements, they're unavoidable. If the fear of rejection is enough to make you or anyone else stop posting then that is the true problem, not the person disagreeing with you. A disagreement, or difference of opinion is natural in a group. Disrespect to members is not tolerated though and if a disagreement advances beyond merely that into name calling or belittling then it carries a price of potentially being banned.

Overall though, I think the reason people are disagreeing with you is because they don't see what you see going on here.

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THANK YOU, you've nailed it ,Mag !

Cell28 wrote:

creepyhollows wrote:Ninja, to be frank, I think the frustration of those responding is that they don't see a problem, and you keep insisting there IS a problem. I was a bit taken aback when I saw your original post as well. I haven't seen any big forum fights, any big drama threads, or any clique wars in a long time.

In my opinion, the majority of the people who come here are capable of coming & posting with little to no interference with their participation. If you're just talking about some members who've left then there's more to the story with some of them, and others (as you've likely seen many "I'm back" threads) go and return at a later date.

As for disagreements, they're unavoidable. If the fear of rejection is enough to make you or anyone else stop posting then that is the true problem, not the person disagreeing with you. A disagreement, or difference of opinion is natural in a group. Disrespect to members is not tolerated though and if a disagreement advances beyond merely that into name calling or belittling then it carries a price of potentially being banned.

Overall though, I think the reason people are disagreeing with you is because they don't see what you see going on here.

:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:
THANK YOU, you've nailed it ,Mag !

But I do, and others do too, so that means that I should be allowed to have my opinions on the matter too, as well as them. :thumbup:
Not just that, but also to better CH, I don't see the problem with trying to get people to be more civil towards one another. As they are fellow CH members. I mean, why would anyone be against it anyway? :wtf:

I would have appreciated it if this thread was more civil too. As that was what I was getting at in the first place. Stuff like this is why I cannot be here any more, at least, a lot of the time. I just want to get this thread closed off first. I hope you understand.