Binding Someone You Love

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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby Drake » Sat Sep 05, 2015 6:07 pm

Fingers crossed.


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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby marshandrias » Sat Sep 05, 2015 10:59 pm

I understand about wanting to help someone and not to let them go down a bad road. I have a relative like that. They were constantly negative and they were in a very bad relationship. I very much wanted to cast a spell to change them. But I realized that sometimes people are the way they are for a reason and they have certain lessons or debts that they need to work out for themselves. I wanted to change them without them knowing it but in the end I didn't think that was really fair. So I asked Spirit to let them see that there are more positive ways of doing things. I asked that they see the truth of how they behave towards themselves, situations, me and others. The farthest I went was asking Spirit help them realize how negative the relationship they were in was. I realized that if I changed them in one situation then how would they fare when it came up again? I would have to keep doing it. I think the most you can ethically do is to someone ask they see the negativity in their lives. I asked that their eyes be opened to how they treat people (me) and how people treat them.

After this, my relative had a huge fight with the other person and really saw the other person's true colors. I also had it out with them. There was anger and tears, but we are in a better place with how they treat me and how I treat them. I told them I would be happy to be a sounding board (they would bring all of their complaints about others to me) but I would not stand for mistreatment. I had to do that for ME. You can love someone and still stand up for yourself and not be a doormat. No one wants to let go of the people they love and I'm not advising that, but each person has to grow up on their own. It's not something we can do for them. We can ask that they see the best way for them but I don't think its right to try to make them take a certain path. What your spirits' do for you, changing you... I wonder if it is more of them putting chances and ideas in front of you so that you can change yourself. No one can ethically MAKE you do something you don't want to do. We change when we are ready to change, but they can help us along our path. If your spirits are actually changing you then the situation is still different because it is with your knowledge and you are asking for their help.

I think there is a way you can work it, but I don't think trying to outright "change" them is in anyone's best interest. I think a push can be warranted but I think you also need to change how you interact with them. If they are constantly negative call them on it. Once again, you can stand up for yourself and not be a doormat. Try a "truth" working so that the blinders fall off and they see themselves and the people and situations around them honestly. After that I would try something for guidance to help them find their best path. Others here could give you great advice how to actually work it.

My 2 cents,
M.


We are who we choose to be. Fate, Destiny, the Gods, the Ancestors... they can put a path before us. We still have to choose to walk it.

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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby Samsara » Sun Sep 06, 2015 2:06 am

People think change is such a horrible thing. Like they would be a zombie of their former self. It's far from it. You're still you but better and improved.

When you're not getting your way in life whether romantic, job or whatever, you owe it to yourself to change for you first of all. When you interact with others, you also owe it to them. People who love you deserve the best from you, not the worst, at the very least common courtesy. Unfortunately in life when we know someone loves us we become brats, we stop trying, we lean on others like a whipping boy or girl, as if they owe us. Sure we can confront people. But if you confront enough times you become the bad guy. You become the argumentative one, the one with the short fuse, the one who jumps to conclusions, etc. Who needs that? Why not use magic, so 1, you can be at peace knowing good things are to come for everyone. 2, so you don't need to repeat things that the ears don't want to hear. Why not go straight and directly in their psyche and program that sh++ right once and for all?

What harm can be done if someone is inspired to offer say better customer service, thus earn more money, have more patience, more love, more mutual respect, more true friends? What harm can be done if you got you situation straight once and for all and have deep understanding for another and can inspire loyalty from even the most vile and broken of us all? I don't see anything unethical about wanting something good for the people you love while getting them off your toes. And maybe they need a shove in the right direction. Most of magic is positive thinking anyways. So all these negative imaginations about what might happen will only happen if you allow yourself to imagine it.


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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby Dragonoake » Sun Sep 06, 2015 11:10 am

GreySkyMorning wrote:
Dragonoake wrote:You could simply tell them that

That could start a huge, otherwise avoidable fight that could do more harm than good.


Maybe, but sometime you just have to say, "Alright, Jack, this is the way it's going to be. If you want me to stay around, this is what I want from you."


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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby Secretsensations » Sun Sep 06, 2015 12:16 pm

How do I word this? It is something almost everybody has thought about, but very few have ever done. I might get flack for this but I have bound some of my husbands, lesser, traits. Will do so again if required. It is not something to be taken lightly but sometimes you have no choice



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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby darklordmidnight » Sun Sep 06, 2015 1:15 pm

There is always a choice.


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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby Aprophis » Sun Sep 06, 2015 3:29 pm

Samsara wrote:People think change is such a horrible thing. Like they would be a zombie of their former self. It's far from it. You're still you but better and improved.

What I found is that people need to want to change for themselves. If you make them change, that is forced and any force that goes against their own will will be rejected. In the worst case, that turns on you because subconsciously they know where it comes from. If they don't want to change you might have to cast it again and again and again and again because they will always resist and move in the opposite direction. Hell, you could even push them in the opposite direction with that.
If you're lucky they want the change themselves subconsciously, then you'd be working with their will and everything works out, but it's a 50/50 chance.

Also when you say you'd be better and improved, I gotta ask, better for whom? Would you have made that decision if you weren't affected by the way they are, meaning ultimately that change is actually for you and they could just 'profit' from it? There's a reason some people don't want to change and that might be because the change wouldn't be for their better. Maybe they need to learn to change themselves and you'd take away that chance?

I mean children don't really know everything and sometimes have to be told. But an adult, who carries responsibility for their own live? I mean it's their life, their feelings, their entirety of being, can you really decide what's best for them? Do you know everything that goes on in their lives, in their heads and in their hearts? Do you know what consequences your forced change will have on their minds, emotions, souls, lives along the line? If you can answer yes to all of that and want to take on the responsibility of their lives, then go for it.

darklordmidnight wrote:There is always a choice.

Indeed, but sometimes sadly it's not one that is recognized.


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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby Secretsensations » Sun Sep 06, 2015 4:00 pm

I have to play devils advocate here. Seeing as I can understand both sides of the coin. We don't know what brought the OP to this decision without knowing all the details. It is a drastic step and all options should be sought before opening that door. In my case it worked out for the best. I did not have to leave my husband. He turned out to be a better person and my kids have their dad in their life. What ever the reason that brought on this decision it should be weighed carefully as it is black magic of which you speak



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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby Samsara » Sun Sep 06, 2015 4:36 pm

toadstools wrote:How do I word this? It is something almost everybody has thought about, but very few have ever done. I might get flack for this but I have bound some of my husbands, lesser, traits. Will do so again if required. It is not something to be taken lightly but sometimes you have no choice


I remember those stories. He was something else.If you're both happier and there was no backlash, I see zero thing wrong.

How is any of this different than asking for God or the universe to step in?

I was recently sent a spell and after reading it, I think it's silly people are jumping to the worst possible outcome. It just makes me shake my head. I mean why get involved in a magical community if you are scared of it in the first place?

Magic is colored by intent. I don't feel my desires are black. Nor am I trying to wipe out their entire mind. I was just giving various examples of types of people and situations magic might be suitable for. But if one were to narrow down the source of all those problems, it is mostly due to bad habits, running off a bad mental program, and not willing to see the truth.


"Man is what he sees in other people."

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Re: Binding Someone You Love

Postby Secretsensations » Sun Sep 06, 2015 4:40 pm

Then do what you. Need to do that is all I have to say <3




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