I'm Looking For Religion That Fits Me.
Posted: Mon Jul 02, 2018 6:38 pm
I meant not offense and without prejudice. I been Christian most of my life. Least it slow, slow down in my teens. It's not sure If I started to question my beliefs by then. I know I quit reading Bible then. But thinking of reading again. Least to see if answers I'm looking for are there. Maybe it's motivation to push myself more. Maybe it's due to my Bio mom letter I've found written to me. I haven't seen her in 13 yrs. Since I was in Foster Care. I know she wants me to continue the path of Christianity. It's in her letter she wrote me, long ago. I have nothing against Christianity. I just grew not attached.
With that being said, jehova Witness. Been going to my door to. Least they used to, until was told to not see em again. In way they where my social life at home. At same time was open minded and grateful. Ever since last year, when I officially became spirit keeper and unofficially due to my former Unbound(s) (they with me) I grew to question where I am and where best relate to me. Since then I befriended 3 psn (PlayStation friends from PS4) for some reason there where open with there spiritual/religious beliefs with me. 1 was more towards healer path and 2 are Wiccans. At same time I heard Religion was White Arts. Which I not mind, but same time I feel I'm more Grey Art.
I know I will cause harm (it's kinda my fear what if I get uncontrollable, what if I gone to far) I'm more of person who is, least leaning towards left hand path. I'm more like interested in certain adult ways the feeling so strong it's hard to control. But yet I crave.(should be adult section?) Even though Im novice. It's probably going destroy me. But it's not going stop me in future. I know I will contacting or try to conjure A Demon and or other BA entity. I know I shouldn't practice Magick. But feels Magick is part of me and who I am. I feel Magick will destroy me yet Magick would save me. Not sure if that makes sense. I have nothing against WA.
I got Many in my Keep that are WA, but most are DA. I'm glad to have all them as my friend's none the less and very grateful to have em. But I know for fact I will have BA in my keep, possibly Demon and or other. I know I should not have one. Least currently since Novice. But I plan push myself. Just need believe myself and confident and bonding. But nothing going stop me to get BA Someday. Even if BA Unbound comes across me. (I feel and keep saying I'll die early. Unsure if vision or deal I made. It feels it real) It's really bothering more than ever to find religion that best fit me. But to me Wicca (could be wrong) and Christianity don't fit well for me to belong.
Especially me being more Grey Art, in way. Pagan feel fit well for me. Due to me want worship many Gods and Goddesses. Especially, one Goddess I really want Pray/ Worship is Lilith. At same time I leaning towards Satanism. But I mixed unsure if the people worship many God's or just one. At same time Im interested to learn more about Satanism. I unsure who to turn and to ask questions. Especially if Worship Many God's or not. If not can we?
What other religions Worship many Gods/Goddesses. That fits my profile well? I want give out my PS4 Gamertag if want private message. But I unsure if that allowed or not. But I want find out what religious beliefs fit me, before my time runs out. Even early if comes to pass. If I found a religion? How do I know fit best for me? Many thanks all and yes I confused many. It's what I do best, especially making long writing.
With that being said, jehova Witness. Been going to my door to. Least they used to, until was told to not see em again. In way they where my social life at home. At same time was open minded and grateful. Ever since last year, when I officially became spirit keeper and unofficially due to my former Unbound(s) (they with me) I grew to question where I am and where best relate to me. Since then I befriended 3 psn (PlayStation friends from PS4) for some reason there where open with there spiritual/religious beliefs with me. 1 was more towards healer path and 2 are Wiccans. At same time I heard Religion was White Arts. Which I not mind, but same time I feel I'm more Grey Art.
I know I will cause harm (it's kinda my fear what if I get uncontrollable, what if I gone to far) I'm more of person who is, least leaning towards left hand path. I'm more like interested in certain adult ways the feeling so strong it's hard to control. But yet I crave.(should be adult section?) Even though Im novice. It's probably going destroy me. But it's not going stop me in future. I know I will contacting or try to conjure A Demon and or other BA entity. I know I shouldn't practice Magick. But feels Magick is part of me and who I am. I feel Magick will destroy me yet Magick would save me. Not sure if that makes sense. I have nothing against WA.
I got Many in my Keep that are WA, but most are DA. I'm glad to have all them as my friend's none the less and very grateful to have em. But I know for fact I will have BA in my keep, possibly Demon and or other. I know I should not have one. Least currently since Novice. But I plan push myself. Just need believe myself and confident and bonding. But nothing going stop me to get BA Someday. Even if BA Unbound comes across me. (I feel and keep saying I'll die early. Unsure if vision or deal I made. It feels it real) It's really bothering more than ever to find religion that best fit me. But to me Wicca (could be wrong) and Christianity don't fit well for me to belong.
Especially me being more Grey Art, in way. Pagan feel fit well for me. Due to me want worship many Gods and Goddesses. Especially, one Goddess I really want Pray/ Worship is Lilith. At same time I leaning towards Satanism. But I mixed unsure if the people worship many God's or just one. At same time Im interested to learn more about Satanism. I unsure who to turn and to ask questions. Especially if Worship Many God's or not. If not can we?
What other religions Worship many Gods/Goddesses. That fits my profile well? I want give out my PS4 Gamertag if want private message. But I unsure if that allowed or not. But I want find out what religious beliefs fit me, before my time runs out. Even early if comes to pass. If I found a religion? How do I know fit best for me? Many thanks all and yes I confused many. It's what I do best, especially making long writing.