Online dating

Amberly · Sat Nov 19, 2022 2:41 pm

Romantic relationships - and anything having to do with them - appall me thanks to an abusive person I barely escaped from earlier this year; shortly after him I trusted someone else with what very little heart I had left to give. The second person got on FB dating and well - that's a whole different drama in itself - but yes, he was dating multiple women in different states. It's not to say all online dating is bad. I have a sibling that found their fiancé online - through Tinder of all places. The fiancé can write an entire book on their family and friends that found spouses with online dating. It's not for me though as I've always believed that my "soulmate" would have been found the traditional way and we would have fell in love over accidentally grabbing the same coffee cup or something. I'm sure my spirits would be more than happy to help me find the right person to love, but they also won't force it either; at least not until I feel ready.

To answer your question: give yourself time to heal and when you're ready, your spirits will guide you; all you have to do is ask/task.

UniverseExplorer · Sun Nov 20, 2022 12:24 am

mystlady wrote: ↑Tue Nov 15, 2022 3:43 pm
My question is: have you tasked your spirit family help you find and believe in love again?

For me that's one reason why I started spirit keeping and it's why I have my Cleopatra Djinn friend.

Angelik wrote: ↑Wed Nov 16, 2022 4:41 am
In the beginning these people I dated sounded nice, but their intention was just taking advantage of me. Dating online is not what I like, when I started the romance thing in my late teens there was no Tinder, the boyfriends I got then I got because I met them by coincidence, it was more like the fate wanted us to meet. With Tinder or other dating online apps/groups you also compete with others, people date multiple people at the same time, and that is not my thing. Although I still have a profile there, I do not match with anyone, at one point I was having thousands of people who swiped right on me of all ages, and I still was struggling finding one who I am attracted to, or I even want to talk to.

Tinder on point!
Tinder and other online dating didn't work, yes there are exeptions, but there is pschology and human dignity.

Human dignity: Online dating is all about attractive appereance, who you are doesn't matter. We swipe and swipe and swipe...
And we become interchangeable, so people date more people simultaneously.
In real life we like people for their scent (biology), biographic similiarities, character, the feeling of trust and security. Appereance too in the beginning, but it's one aspect among others.
And we have time to get to know each other.

Psycholgy: Online dating works with our reward center in brain. It become an addiction to swipe.
The choice of potential partner is too large. We can't decide. That's the same reason why we have more happy couples in a village than in a big city.
Second problem with the huge amount of possibilities is that we are in fear to miss someone. We have the feeling to find the best partner after the next swipe. Even if we found the "perfect" partner (nobody is perfect) we're in fear to miss the real perfect partner for us. And we haven't time to get to know each other we could miss the right partner. That's why there are people who end their relationship with their right partner after some months, maybe there is a better one. Or they never find a partner, there isn't the right, except behind the next swipe. Or they have more partner at the same time and still searching for the right.

@Satella Congratulations
@all I think that's the way that works, without pressure and fear to miss the right one

Tarvos · Sun Nov 20, 2022 7:02 am

jezebela wrote: ↑Thu Nov 17, 2022 1:42 pm i have met my soulmate, and that's not a nice experience partly because we didn't have a happy ending. we were together at the wrong time wrong space, and i seriously don't know the purpose of us meeting to begin with.

from there on, i understand that soulmate is something u have connection with, but does not lead to a happy ending. and ... even if u met ur soulmate somewhere... and u feel the pull... there's no telling u will be together. and i can say this is extremely painful when i met a few new ones, and i know deep inside my heart, we would never even had the chance to meet in this lifetime.

so i think pets would be a better companion in replacing humans for me.

I don't know. Could they be soul contracts instead? I haven't had a soul mate yet, I don't think. But I did meet my past life partner—someone who I'm currently interested in. And she probably opened me up to this side of the border, and I've become a spirit keeper.

I'm pretty into spiritual entities or spirits and open to the idea of not having a physical partner. I usually end up with emotionally abusive partners, though, so I'd rather not risk getting hurt again. I think dating can be scary enough, let alone online dating. I'm not forcing anything and just let things happen as they may. Let's all wish each other a lot of luck! $/.\$

Lux · Sun Nov 20, 2022 7:07 am

UniverseExplorer wrote: ↑Sun Nov 20, 2022 12:24 am
Angelik wrote: ↑Wed Nov 16, 2022 4:41 am
In the beginning these people I dated sounded nice, but their intention was just taking advantage of me. Dating online is not what I like, when I started the romance thing in my late teens there was no Tinder, the boyfriends I got then I got because I met them by coincidence, it was more like the fate wanted us to meet. With Tinder or other dating online apps/groups you also compete with others, people date multiple people at the same time, and that is not my thing. Although I still have a profile there, I do not match with anyone, at one point I was having thousands of people who swiped right on me of all ages, and I still was struggling finding one who I am attracted to, or I even want to talk to.

Tinder on point!
Tinder and other online dating didn't work, yes there are exeptions, but there is pschology and human dignity.

Human dignity: Online dating is all about attractive appereance, who you are doesn't matter. We swipe and swipe and swipe...
And we become interchangeable, so people date more people simultaneously.
In real life we like people for their scent (biology), biographic similiarities, character, the feeling of trust and security. Appereance too in the beginning, but it's one aspect among others.
And we have time to get to know each other.

Psycholgy: Online dating works with our reward center in brain. It become an addiction to swipe.
The choice of potential partner is too large. We can't decide. That's the same reason why we have more happy couples in a village than in a big city.
Second problem with the huge amount of possibilities is that we are in fear to miss someone. We have the feeling to find the best partner after the next swipe. Even if we found the "perfect" partner (nobody is perfect) we're in fear to miss the real perfect partner for us. And we haven't time to get to know each other we could miss the right partner. That's why there are people who end their relationship with their right partner after some months, maybe there is a better one. Or they never find a partner, there isn't the right, except behind the next swipe. Or they have more partner at the same time and still searching for the right.

Yes it is exactly as you described.

Darknorth · Tue Dec 20, 2022 5:30 pm

Online dating is a tough place, with lots of competitions. I'm sure many have heard about the 20-80 concept where 20% of the effort produces 80% of the results. Online dating is the same where 20% of the users gets 80% of the matches. This translates to 20% of the guys get match to 80% of the girls. For girls the numbers are different but not by much. Online dating is all about visual and the first impression. Many guys will swipe sorely based on the pictures and rarely read the bios. What this means is that if your pictures are not good, you are more likely to be swipe left on. Another thing of note is that there are people who will only match with you to satisfy their ego, to brag about their number of matches - yes guys do compete on how many matches they have. Modern online dating is not the same as 10 years ago where there are less people who use online dating, and the quality of the match is higher. I know people who found their soulmate through online dating many years ago said that they would not stand a chance in the modern dating environment.

Osean · Tue Dec 20, 2022 10:21 pm

I can’t say that I’ve ever tasked my family with help on finding love. I’m not really at a place that I’m actively looking for it. I don’t tend to date online because I’d rather find it organically. I have recently added more adult spirit types to my family but they aren’t here yet so we will see what happens.

shieon · Wed Dec 21, 2022 1:12 am

I've been wary about it. I think I made the mistake of paying a practitioner who specialized in what she aligns with ("black magick") who would do group love spells (on the self...but I noticed she did on "targets" directly which is a no-no for me). I personally had issues with this seller and I feel her disposition against a lot of her clients affected what she intentioned. Could be a number of things. I ended up in an abusive relationship and just recently had to file a protection order due to physical stalking and online harassment. Which was quite literally happening last week of November. This person met me through a dating website too...I never experienced such an awful relationship before so it discouraged me, because it obviously traumatized me.

It felt like I downgraded and I was disappointed in myself because I know what it is like being with one of my soulmates already... It just paled so much in comparison. Though at the same time I felt I gained an experience, that I can understand now instead of as an outside perspective. But the grief and unnecessary struggles was not worth it.

It's so hard because I am honestly turned off. I went on dates with three Pisces men in the summer (lol an actual thing that happened unbeknownst to me) but after that I just passively let the messages and "likes" on my dating apps I'm on collect. I still believe in romantic love though but I just never saw it as a priority. I have a feeling I will get what I need and want later on though. I feel I know what to expect for my future but the problem is I also am in the same boat and I run into a lot of abusive people throughout the years. I learned I need to find someone who is a "safe person" for me.

While I love my spirit relationships, I am looking at it as a vehicle. When I was dating and in a relationship, the human spirit I formed a "relationship" with mostly would learn more about himself and even me through these connections. That's how I feel about my "relationships" with beings or spirits, I see it as an influence. Only if it is all organic too.

Also, I agree about swipe culture lol. I was never a social or dating apps kind of person...

ROWN ROSALIND · Wed Dec 21, 2022 8:15 am

Years before I started spirit keeping, I married my best friend. We met when we both had given up on finding someone and were just pursuing our own interests. There are so many types of loving relationships these days and it seems people are more open to sharing how they define that. Recently my SO and I discussed plans to create another tiny home just for them, so we could each have our own spaces, and come together whenever we would like to. It's been nice to evolve together and make up new adventures as we go along . I also saw a news story somewhat recently of these two best friends that call each other their platonic soulmate. They both have romantic partners but when it comes to assigning power of attorney or other important legal titles, they will assign each other over their romantic partners. One of my best friends is one of those luminous people who collects hundreds of friends who all adore them and will bend over backwards to help them find jobs, places to live, go on vacations, etc. They are so loved far and wide, yet has not found a romantic long-term SO in adulthood.
It sounds like you might be interested in discovering what type of love relationship(s) would be fulfilling to you with other humans here and now. I have wished for certain set of personal characteristics in someone I think I find desirable or will make me happy, but there are limitations on my perspective and breadth of experience. Someone wiser said a good exercise would be to discuss with your spirits the main feelings you want to have, and the way you want to live your life. For example, years ago I might have wished, "I want to meet someone who is tall, handsome, kind, has a great sense of humor, a wonderful family, is financially secure, etc." Instead if I focus on my feelings and designing the life I want to live with this person, I might say, "I want to meet someone that I am excited and happy to see everyday. I find them to be so attractive and we experience a lot of joy together. I feel lucky that this person considers my wants and needs and we communicate well both when things are going well or not so well. I feel I am included in events with the people important in their life and vice versa. We trust each other deeply. We live a life unfettered by finances as we are committed to both spend and live and also save for the future, etc." If you're into journaling you could start to get imaginative on the fine details of designing your life full of love and loved ones, and see where it leads you. Best wishes to you...

ROWN ROSALIND · Wed Dec 21, 2022 8:31 am

ROWN ROSALIND wrote: ↑Wed Dec 21, 2022 8:15 am Years before I started spirit keeping, I married my best friend. We met when we both had given up on finding someone and were just pursuing our own interests. There are so many types of loving relationships these days and it seems people are more open to sharing how they define that. Recently my SO and I discussed plans to create another tiny home just for them, so we could each have our own spaces, and come together whenever we would like to. It's been nice to evolve together and make up new adventures as we go along . I also saw a news story somewhat recently of these two best friends that call each other their platonic soulmate. They both have romantic partners but when it comes to assigning power of attorney or other important legal titles, they will assign each other over their romantic partners. One of my best friends is one of those luminous people who collects hundreds of friends who all adore them and will bend over backwards to help them find jobs, places to live, go on vacations, etc. They are so loved far and wide, yet has not found a romantic long-term SO in adulthood.
It sounds like you might be interested in discovering what type of love relationship(s) would be fulfilling to you with other humans here and now. I have wished for certain set of personal characteristics in someone I think I find desirable or will make me happy, but there are limitations on my perspective and breadth of experience. Someone wiser said a good exercise would be to discuss with your spirits the main feelings you want to have, and the way you want to live your life. For example, years ago I might have wished, "I want to meet someone who is tall, handsome, kind, has a great sense of humor, a wonderful family, is financially secure, etc." Instead if I focus on my feelings and designing the life I want to live with this person, I might say, "I want to meet someone that I am excited and happy to see everyday. I find them to be so attractive and we experience a lot of joy together. I feel lucky that this person considers my wants and needs and we communicate well both when things are going well or not so well. I feel I am included in events with the people important in their life and vice versa. We trust each other deeply. We live a life unfettered by finances as we are committed to both spend and live and also save for the future, etc." If you're into journaling you could start to get imaginative on the fine details of designing your life full of love and loved ones, and see where it leads you. Best wishes to you...

Also, I wanted to mention this is my second marriage, going on 8 years now, and my prior divorce was brutal. Didn't think I would recover, so there is definitely hope for better experiences. Sending love.

mariana_trenchue · Wed Dec 28, 2022 6:52 am

I met my now partner at Reddit a few months back. At first we only talked about animes and "normal" stuff, until she suddenly shared her experience and a little stuff about her spirit friends that piqued my interest. A few months before I met her, I was starting to be Agnostic, to the point that if I met her, I probably would be an Atheist tbh haha. I remember trying my best not to be jealous whenever she will astral travel to someone because we were only friends back then

haha.

I always look forward to our calls every night, I would even search online for some silly jokes and pick up lines just so I can talk to her longer HAHAH.

Slowly, without me noticing, I managed to gain the trust and love of her spirit friends and her immortal partners. They would visit me, and help me test how physically sensitive I am.

It was when we finally said our feelings to each other that I truly believed they like me, not only because they allowed me to be with her but also they binded us together

Whenever I talk to her before, and even now that we are together, I always feel at peace with her. We both feel that this is our first healthy relationship so there's still a lot more things that we need to improve in ourselves. One thing I love about us is how quickly we resolve our problems, there isn't a night that we let one of us sleep with a heavy heart.

She's amazing, very. She's funny, very understanding and loving. I always tell her that she's the best thing ever happened to me. She never failed to make me feel special and loved.

What's more amazing tho is that for years, I've this tingly sensation on my ears and I would often hear someone calling my name. At first I thought it was only my family member but when I asked them abt it they would say no. I actually got scared haha ngl. And when I talked to her about it she said that she had multiple dreams about me before! No one can change my mind when I say that I truly believe that the two of us are destined for each other. UwU

Online dating

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