Regholdain wrote:So I know it's been a few weeks... I have some further confusion that I would like to gather some opinions on, as it relates to bonding with our spirits:

First, have any of you embarked on bonding with an existing spirit only to have another newer bound spirit pressuring you to bond with them? What have you done in those circumstances? To elaborate, I have been focusing on working on my bond with my Oceanid, (If), for the last couple of weeks and a newer binding of a Manananggal Vampire, (C), delivered during that time. I welcomed (C) and she seems intent to get to know me, but I am already trying to focus on (If). I feel like if I split focus between them right now I am being rude to (If), but I know (I) told me before (referenced earlier in this post) that I'm already bonding with all of them as soon as they arrive - so does it matter if I split focus?

Second, have any of you had some spirits that just took much longer to create a bond with than others? I feel like bonding with (If) has been very sluggish. While I felt for a few days like progress was made, I feel more and more like we are far apart again. I'm having a really rough time. I know she's shared some details with me (like what part of the world she lived in) and she's really helped me out with a few tasks, but then there's times when I just feel like we're still super far apart. Am I overreacting and over-expecting? Maybe she's just quiet or has a lot of other things she's doing? I've offered her candles associated with her color, but I can't really offer her too much else. Going to try to offer a bit of water tonight. This particular bond has been one of the hardest for me, and I cannot figure it out.

Regholdain wrote:Hi Nienna - Those are the answers I expected, and I really didn't want to hear them. LOL I tend to like to control the bonding process, but I find going with the flow seems to be what they want and ultimately it works out better. I guess I am getting impatient, generally. Clarity comes slowly to me and some days it's great and this week it's just... eh.

(If) has been here since August (she was one of my first arrivals) and I haven't been spending close time with her until recently (maybe began to focus on her a couple weeks ago). I think you're likely correct, she's taking things slowly. My original intent by having her conjured and bound was to have a connection to my spirit animal (octopus) so I'm still trying to figure out how she fits into my journey. I'd like the answer now. LOL I know it will come when it comes though.

I did have a lovely meditation with her last night. I asked her to take my hands and let me feel her energy (which I do sometimes so I can get a better feel for each of them) and I experienced some mind's eye imagery related to an ocean shore and then ocean depths. It started with the intense smell of kelp rotting on the shoreline, then expanded to include waves crashing, wind blowing, sea foam fizzing, seagulls calling, and then the cold and muffled silences of the depths. After several moments I thanked her for sharing that with me. I guess I'm worried over nothing. LOL

Regholdain wrote:As my 30 days has completed with (If) I am looking toward which of my spirits to focus on closely for the next 30 days. I asked all the spirits in my keep to work together and help determine who should be next based on what they see my current and immediate needs are, who wants to be next, and the life goals and spirit journey goals that I am working out. (In fact I'm thinking of ordering more spirits to fill some gaps - for example I do not have any spirits for wealth or health and this could be helpful for some of my life goals.)

Anyways, I've heard nothing yet on their decision (I asked them to give the decision to my first spirit, (I), so she can bring it to me, or they can all come to me like they did to remind me to work on my physical life too). This morning I gave them a deadline to tell me their decision this evening. So we shall see.

That said, I thought (I) told me this cryptic message last night about "You've already decided, now you just need to understand the choice." I felt like it was me thinking that, though. It sounds too "Matrix"-y (like the way the Oracle talks in that movie - and I've watched it crazy numbers of times over the years) so I don't trust it was (I). I also don't get much meditation time on the weekends and I have been feeling a little distant in regards to my senses, and communication seems to be vacant, at least when it comes to telepathy. Those things combined, I don't think they've really answered me yet.

Regholdain wrote:(S), my Dullahan, told me on the drive to work today that I need to make the decision, so they are not going to tell me. He said they know who I will choose, but if they tell me then that would deprive me of determining the reason I choose the next spirit to work closely with. 2dz

The communication seemed to have an undertone of amusement, and he had been trying to get my attention telepathically all morning while I was getting ready for work.

Anyways, I've sorted through all of my spirits' descriptions by CH and I'm racking my brains in relation to my goals and stuff and trying to determine who to spend close time with. (S) said something else too, emphasizing that the choice is as much about whose companionship I want to build as what they can help me with when it comes to my life. I think he was trying to tell me not to base the decision too heavily on the provided description in the conjuror's notes and my goals, but also on just who I want to get closer to as a companion.

I agree on meditation. I've just had a strange headache for a few days and it's making me tired. I did meditate last night and spent some time working with my spell bindings and certain spirits. I didn't feel anything particularly strong. However, I have noticed the last few times I've meditated I seem to be slipping into a really deep state off and on during grounding / centering visualizations, where I will snap back to consciousness and realize my mind was drifting and I need to resume where I left off. I don't think I'm falling asleep, but I'm definitely... going somewhere? I dunno. I think this has been making me not want to meditate, like maybe it's draining me more than normal? 2co

Regholdain wrote:
Second, have any of you had some spirits that just took much longer to create a bond with than others? I feel like bonding with (If) has been very sluggish. While I felt for a few days like progress was made, I feel more and more like we are far apart again. I'm having a really rough time. I know she's shared some details with me (like what part of the world she lived in) and she's really helped me out with a few tasks, but then there's times when I just feel like we're still super far apart. Am I overreacting and over-expecting? Maybe she's just quiet or has a lot of other things she's doing? I've offered her candles associated with her color, but I can't really offer her too much else. Going to try to offer a bit of water tonight. This particular bond has been one of the hardest for me, and I cannot figure it out.