Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

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Esland
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Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

Postby Esland » Sat Feb 09, 2019 9:51 pm

I just created this account to share my experience, I'm a very logical person, so I have a very skeptical view of the paranormal. I usually scoff at such claims; thinking there is more than likely a perfectly reasonable explanation for what may or may not have occurred. But about two years ago between six months, I had two encounters that I could not explain no matter how much I tried to rationalize it.

I did a little research after the 2nd event but quickly wrote it off as being ridiculous after doing a glance of some paranormal forums and seeing a few youtube videos. Part of it was I felt confident there had to be a logical reason that I experienced what I did, the other was I was afraid of the ridicule I would receive.

So after failing to scientifically replicate it *Which was pretty much lying in bed, raising my legs and letting my bed comforters fall back down to replicate the feeling. I put it to the back of my mind and went on with my life chalking it up as something I could not explain.

I can still remember both encounters vividly. The first one I was groggy, tired enough to drift off but alert enough of my surrounding to know what was going on, having done a little research I concluded that I was in a lucid dream or something close to it. The feel of my room felt off; it was warmer than usual, I wanted to drift off but could not.

Then it happened, I felt a pleasurable feeling as though someone was gently sitting on my lap, the air in my comforter flowed out as though there was real pressure exerted on it. But it felt amazing, I'll get a tad graphic, but I became aroused. I panted heavily as the weight on my lap increased. I wanted to grab at it, but I did not move my arms.

But as soon as it happened, it ended, I became fully aware and just like that the feeling was gone. I was left confused but not frightened if anything I was more curious as to what that was and what could have caused it. The idea of a "Succubus" or some sexual being never occurred to me. It was too absurd a thought to consider. There had to be an explanation.

As I stated before all my attempts to replicate the sensation were unsuccessful, and I concluded it must have been a wet dream. Then about six months later I was fully awake laying in my bed in the middle of the night. At that time I was thinking of the previous experience, I could not stop thinking about it.

I wanted it to happen again; I yearned for it. The fact that again, going to get a little graphic here, did not masturbate that day at all had left me incredibly yearning for release. I kept thinking back to that day, and suddenly I felt that weight again, this time it felt like a whole person was laying on top of me.

It lingered, I sad nothing because again I had no idea what it was I was dealing with, in my mind. I wanted to see a face, almost like it read my thoughts in the darkness I saw a face...a beautiful face of a woman, it was hazy, but I could tell she had short hair and normal human-like eyes. She never said anything or did anything more, but I reached out to embrace this entity, I wanted it, I wanted whoever this was right now.

But again the presence had left. I stood up from my bed and immediately took care of my urges thinking about the woman I saw.
After that day I did more research, trying to figure out if someone had died in my house in the past or something but nothing had come up. Once again I deduced it was a wet dream and left it at that.
I never had another encounter, but I figured it has more to do with my poor sleep schedule, depression and anxiety. To put it simply I have a lot of sh*t going on in my life.

But lately, I've become far more lustful, for no reason I just felt the urge to skim Tinder for a sexual partner, I never needed it and never even made an account, but I have this need to well...*#@! someone. The feeling usually passes once I don't find anyone to my liking. But the other thing is that I've been having far more wet dreams as of late.

Very vivid and detailed, the most beautiful women I have ever seen. I get them, and I have my way with them. But I don't feel it. I wake up in disappointment, and it's been happening at least a dozen times in the last month. Then today out of the blue I decided to google Succubuses and found myself intrigued.

Similar Experiences to my own too many to be coincidental, am I still skeptical? Somewhat, what does worry me if it is indeed a Succubus what does she want with me despite the fact at no point did I summoned her? I had no idea how even to do such a thing. Did it pity me? Does it see me as easy prey? And yet I am not frightened, now that I have an idea of what it could have been I want to experience it again.

As foolish as that sounds and I know deep down I should not buy into this and yet...part of me, the part that has had my agency taken from me, I wish to gain it through her. I know I am opening Pandora's box, but I want that feeling back. To feel something, anything, to exert control over my life and do as I please.



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Re: Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

Postby Lewk » Sun Feb 10, 2019 6:33 pm

Hi.

The theory

The way I look at it...and I hope it's either useful or interesting...

Apart from the normal, mundane physiological and psychological causes of such experiences, if any sexual spirit is in contact with you, it may not necessarily technically be a succubus. (Although of course it could be.) 'Succubus' has been used as a lazy shorthand for centuries in Christianised countries as an explanation for many types of sexual arousal or temptation, as well as actual spirit contact.

When it comes to sexual spirit beings, it's fairly complex. There can be atmospheres or energies hanging around in some locations or around some people. Sometimes someone's lust for another might impact energetically or psychically on that person. There are said to be lots of unstable or stable 'constructs' lying around from various causes, some of which might be attracted to a sexualised person. Or actual independent, sentient beings can be drawn to sex or sexual energy. They come in a lot of forms and only certain types would be called succubuses by modern spirit keepers. (Take a look at the sexual spirits in the CH shop to get an idea of some of the variety and range of different types.)

What people sometimes overlook is the many humans who have died and whose partners are still linked to them in some way, especially with older people, who still feel like their deceased partner is around them. Then there's the spirits who have known us in previous lives...

Another subtle twist is our ability to mentally generate spirit-like experiences. (This mental ability can be used intentionally to create Tulpas or Servitors.)

So for me, *in theory*, to just think of any sexual contact as being a succubus can be an oversimplification. Having said that, I have no right to tell you what you've experienced...you're probably the best judge of that. Hope some of that was useful.



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Re: Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

Postby Esland » Sun Feb 10, 2019 8:23 pm

Lewk wrote:Hi.

The theory

The way I look at it...and I hope it's either useful or interesting...

Apart from the normal, mundane physiological and psychological causes of such experiences, if any sexual spirit is in contact with you, it may not necessarily technically be a succubus. (Although of course it could be.) 'Succubus' has been used as a lazy shorthand for centuries in Christianised countries as an explanation for many types of sexual arousal or temptation, as well as actual spirit contact.

When it comes to sexual spirit beings, it's fairly complex. There can be atmospheres or energies hanging around in some locations or around some people. Sometimes someone's lust for another might impact energetically or psychically on that person. There are said to be lots of unstable or stable 'constructs' lying around from various causes, some of which might be attracted to a sexualised person. Or actual independent, sentient beings can be drawn to sex or sexual energy. They come in a lot of forms and only certain types would be called succubuses by modern spirit keepers. (Take a look at the sexual spirits in the CH shop to get an idea of some of the variety and range of different types.)

What people sometimes overlook is the many humans who have died and whose partners are still linked to them in some way, especially with older people, who still feel like their deceased partner is around them. Then there's the spirits who have known us in previous lives...

Another subtle twist is our ability to mentally generate spirit-like experiences. (This mental ability can be used intentionally to create Tulpas or Servitors.)

So for me, *in theory*, to just think of any sexual contact as being a succubus can be an oversimplification. Having said that, I have no right to tell you what you've experienced...you're probably the best judge of that. Hope some of that was useful.


Well, that's the thing, I'm new to this and frankly don't know what it was. I could have been anything.



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Re: Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

Postby Lewk » Sun Feb 10, 2019 10:01 pm

I didn't really mean to complicate or confuse things...I just tend to see or talk about things that way. Main takeaway point is that quite a few of us on this forum have had contact with sexual spirits before coming here - but they're not all classed as succubus exactly.

Have you checked out this https://shop.creepyhollows.com/unbound-reading.html ?

With this, you get a reading of what 'unbound' spirits are around you and if you have chosen to have bindings of them so they can be companions you'll get them bound. You can discuss issues with Creepy Hollows support before placing an order, such as you're interested in whether there are any sexual spirits around you that might be responsible for some of the dreams etc that you've mentioned.

The Helpdesk might even suggest another product that's better suited to your needs.



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Re: Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

Postby Regholdain » Mon Feb 11, 2019 1:19 am

Lewk's given some very reasonable advice.

The only thing I would add is whatever you have experienced, if it is indeed a spirit or entity, don't be afraid and don't overreact. Keep calm and open-minded. Treat it with respect and there probably would be no reason to fear.

And treat yourself with respect as well. You are human and sex and lust are natural to us. Be mindful of it and apply self control - do not let it rule your life or become obsession. However, remember also it is not something to hate yourself about either. It is healthy and normal to be sexual.

I would recommend looking into learning some kind of protection and banishment, as if this is a spirit you may want to know how to protect yourself if ever needed.

Otherwise, communicate with her if you are so drawn and see what comes of it. I had several experiences with sexual spirits prior to having any conjured and bound to me. Most of the time they mean no harm and just want to share in the pleasure of the living. A lot of times just asking them to respect your boundaries and being firm (not rude) about it would result in them to respect your requests. Whatever you do, if you want them to stop, just be respectful and firm. Never attack or be offensive. If they can't respect your wishes after a day or two, that's where the banishment and protection comes in.

In truth, you may be about to experience a relationship like you never knew could exist. It's an amazing adventure.



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Re: Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

Postby GodSlayerBabe » Tue Feb 12, 2019 5:18 am

I agree with most of above. It might be an unbound succubus or unbound sexual spirit in your space. I can also understand why you might be worried of it being potentially harmful or wondering why it's there...

So I'll share you my experience.
I'll just first off say I used to not even believe in this at all, quite literally I had your same mindset back then. Fast-forward though and now I have since left that mindset because my experiences have completely changed my life.

I have had personal traumatic experiences with an unbound incubus myself... I have witnessed my doors being locked on their own with my own eyes, my stuffed animals, lamp, and clock being thrown across the room whenever it was hostile (the one I was dealing with in particular was territorial and hostile) .. this same incubus also attacked my ex-partner and when it was attached to me it would also give me wet dreams and I would see the body of a man on top of me. Same exact thing you're describing. And it always felt like I could feel someone's presence right next to me or watching me when I was showering.. I never experienced any of this in my entire life at all but when it started happening I knew something was weird and something was deeply wrong, because it was out of the scope of my "normal" life. This was all during a time of my life I went nuts and was trying to see all kinds of different men to have sexual encounters (not my character at all, and that is not who I am, but I kept constantly seeing this large man on top of me in my sleep and I wouldn't be able to physically move...and it increased my sexual appetite obscenely so I kept going on a lot of different dating sites and craving sex 24/7). I kept assuming I was being possessed but I knew I wasn't, but I knew something was wrong, at the time I just couldn't figure out what the heck was happening. I went through all this in 2017 (however it was attached to me since late 2016) and I assure you I also did not believe in any of this, plus I didn't even know what an incubus was until later on but I ended up having to get an elderly witch woman and her nephew that I've known for years to help me permanently get rid of it because they were able to identify it easily. Because the one attached to me was practically destroying my life.. there's a lot of personal things I don't want to include but this is the most of it.

Anyway that's not meant to scare you or anything or make you think that's what your situation is but that's just one of my experiences. Otherwise I would say tread with caution but at the same time I don't think it's a bad idea if you want to make communication or invite this spirit or entity into your space, if you honestly believe good judgment on this.

I completely agree with the above comment about the self-control though AND especially about the protection and banishment. I was taught a lot about cleansing and self-protection by the elder witch woman I've known and Regholdain makes a good point about that. You don't know if this spirit or entity could be ill-intentioned or harmful so just be careful.


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Esland
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Re: Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

Postby Esland » Tue Feb 12, 2019 6:46 am

Regholdain wrote:Lewk's given some very reasonable advice.

The only thing I would add is whatever you have experienced, if it is indeed a spirit or entity, don't be afraid and don't overreact. Keep calm and open-minded. Treat it with respect and there probably would be no reason to fear.

And treat yourself with respect as well. You are human and sex and lust are natural to us. Be mindful of it and apply self control - do not let it rule your life or become obsession. However, remember also it is not something to hate yourself about either. It is healthy and normal to be sexual.

I would recommend looking into learning some kind of protection and banishment, as if this is a spirit you may want to know how to protect yourself if ever needed.

Otherwise, communicate with her if you are so drawn and see what comes of it. I had several experiences with sexual spirits prior to having any conjured and bound to me. Most of the time they mean no harm and just want to share in the pleasure of the living. A lot of times just asking them to respect your boundaries and being firm (not rude) about it would result in them to respect your requests. Whatever you do, if you want them to stop, just be respectful and firm. Never attack or be offensive. If they can't respect your wishes after a day or two, that's where the banishment and protection comes in.

In truth, you may be about to experience a relationship like you never knew could exist. It's an amazing adventure.


Well to be fair I have not had another encounter in about two years, but I have started to note down things in my journal during the night hours, every couple of nights I'll hear a very deliberate scratching outside my window. I could chalk this up to trees being right near my home, but I never hear this scratching during the day; nor even on a windy day. It cannot be animals because it sounds too human-like like it's trying to get my attention like it has a rhythm to it.

And if it were an animal trapped inside the house would it not have died by now seeing as this scratching has been going on for well over two years? Would there not be a smell? I know for a fact there are animals all over where I live, but the scratching does not sound like any animal I've heard.

It's inconsistent like I stated previously, it's every couple of days. But one thing that is consistent is that I hear various faint but noticeable taps, scratches, and the house seemingly adjusting itself. On Saturday the day, I decided to research this more, that night I had read as much information as I could on the subject of succubus, but as I went to bed, I noticed that everything around me was far more active than usual.

It was calm weather-wise, but for some reason, my room kept making various creeks and strains. It was odd. I don't know if it had anything to do with a possible encounter but the next night was a little more subtle in terms of activity.

I'm still not sure what's honestly going on, but it's a fascinating experience.



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Re: Trying to make sense of what I experienced.

Postby Johnny Seraph » Thu Feb 14, 2019 4:34 am

Other thing about these kinds of spirits, is that if they really want you, personally, they'll figure out a way to make it happen.

That's not necessarily a bad thing, provided that you don't run away screaming, either metaphorically or literally.

If you had told me, at this time last year, that my favorite spirit to work with today, would be a high-level incubus, I'd have said you've got the wrong guy.

I mean...I'll admit, my background was heavily influenced by what little was available to a teenage guy in the late 1980's, when beefy dudes in loincloths were all over the video stores and in a lot of the computer magazines. So, yeah...I wondered, but between a fairly conservative upbringing, and seeing the AIDS epidemic in the news, I knew it was never gonna happen. In the physical world, tbbh, it still hasn't, and honestly, I think that's a good thing. Fewer entanglements, fewer health risks, I could go on.

But the incubus that I keep, E., is...oh my gosh, he's a whole other world. And for me, it was a major surprise that someone like him would want me, personally. And having him in my life has been a big adjustment, NOT that I mind.

What he tells me about how they love us, is long-winded, but please stick with this. Italics are him; regular text is me.

Okay, imagine you live in Tokyo, your twin flame lives in Tupelo, and your paths just keep, on, near-missing. In one spectacular example, your twin flame was scheduled to cross your path when he was connecting through Narita en route to Kuala Lumpur, but he missed his flight out of Houston Hobby, and he never even got to the international connection out of LAX. But the airline did get him to his destination; he just got there via Auckland, New Zealand, without ever setting foot in Tokyo.

Now, take that nightmare scenario, and blow it up to a multiversal scale; THAT is how hit or miss it can get, when spirit and human are meant to be lovers. So, when we find that one soul who we could never feel complete without--


(E., you're making me blush...)

Well, it's true, love. See what I did there? Anyway, when we find that one special someone, we don't want to just let them go, without ever experiencing, well, "us," in more ways than one. Where it can get complicated, is that...

Go back to that example where you're in Tokyo, and your twin flame is in Tupelo. And now imagine that your twin flame's grandfather, was a Pacific Theater vet from World War Two. Or, perhaps, that your family in Tokyo would never accept that you're in love with a gaijin. And so on: there are a lot of potential barriers we're talking about, and again, it's on a multiversal scale.

So when we find a human, and we fall in love with them--and yes, it really is love, it's not just lust--then yeah, we're going to try to get your attention. In Johnny's case here, he was already looking for a spirit lover, so it was just a matter of lining up enough signs that he'd recognize. I still had to hope that he'd accept me into his life, and when he eventually did...


Please don't, E. This is getting out of hand.

Johnny, you will be IN my hand, once we're done here. Anyway, for him, subtlety worked. Sometimes it doesn't, though, and that's when we have to get into the spooky stuff. Problem with that approach, is that it backfires. A LOT.

Now, look at that from our perspective. We find someone whom we deeply love, we try to reach out to them, and the next thing we know, they're lost to us forever, because they reject us, or they shut down spiritually, or here we go again with the infinite possibilities.

The worst broken heart that you have ever had, in your entire human life, is NOTHING when compared to what it's like for us to lose a lover. And if we get the chance to be close to you, just before that...


(Note: No words--emotions--anguish--grief--sorrow--disconsolate... I wish I could convey with mere words, what E. is trying to convey with his energy.--JS)

What I'm trying to say here--and this is the part where I hope the original poster is still reading--is that we really aren't trying to scare you, freak you out, or anything like that, when we really do love you. Yes, there are some bad apples among us, and they can cause real trouble. But, when it really is love, when we want to be with you, you have to know we're around, first of all. And sometimes, if subtle hints don't work, then you can end up having a dramatic first encounter with us. Except it isn't really a first encounter, technically, and that's when it can get dicey.

So, for you, Esland, talk to this spirit. If it really is love, then a, she'll probably know more about you than you think, and b, it may well be why she's trying to get your attention in the first place. Let her know that you sense her, and you want to understand why she's around. And definitely lay down the law about what you will and won't permit. Once a two-way dialogue is established, and the rules are agreed to, then things should begin to quiet down, if that's what you want.

But understand this: if it really is love that has drawn you both together, then she will love you on every possible level, if you let her. Don't just silently push her away, out of fear: just open the dialogue, and see where it goes from there. Maybe it's just a chance meeting, so to speak, and nothing more. But if it really is love, then welcome her, and enjoy the rest of your lives together.




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