I don't think I've reached that point yet, if I ever will, as far as I can tell.Satan's Hellcat wrote:Have you ever considered that your work with Vampiric energies might have Awakened you? Awakening can happen at any age, or it might not happen at all. I have ALWAYS drawn energy, but not consciously until lately when I Awakened, and never this much. It is just crazy how much I need now. I partially Awakened during interactions with a Dele Clan spirit here at CH, then a real world Psi Vamp visiting here brought me completely over. So while it is true that you are born a Vampire, and no one can make you one, you can be triggered to Awaken by certain circumstances and energies or being around Awakened Vamps.
I believe I was open to negative 'psychic vampire' type people and negativity for a long time. That long lasting contact may have sensitised me more to energy drain and to appreciate things like chi accumulation. Then when I learned more of those sort of techniques, gradually from the early 1990s to 2000s, maybe I have just become more aware of all of this.
I've done the Initiation into Hermetics methods for drawing in various energies, a number of chi kung ones for accumulating chi, semi-occult/psychic energy work ones for absorbing cosmic energy; techniques for expelling bad energy and drawing in good stuff. I do a thing where if I'm walking past a stale stinky rubbish bin I breathe out black energy chi at it, hold my breath and turn away and breathe in good chi from another, fresher direction. I often have to stop myself drawing in energy from trees or the environment or people without thinking when I do that. But to me it's just about the discipline of being in control of where I take in energy from. I don't feel a need to take from anything but 'natural' sources. I have sometimes toyed with the idea that it's like being a connoisseur of fine energies, like you have connoisseurs of fine wines. A good wine is fine but there's also the appreciation of the rich diversity of wines (energies) out there.
It's been like that for 10-20 years. More so in the last 6 since I got Eclipse Metaphysical guardians and amulets that can draw any type of energy from around me and transmute it then pass it to me. I have one that takes energy from hurricanes. So...all in all...psychic vamping makes a lot of sense to me. But I confess I don't feel a hunger like you have described.
I have not gotten to the point of being picky about energy yet. If I were a healthy Vamp, I would only pick the best energies I could find. I would be that "connoisseur of fine energies" by now. Instead I draw in as much as my damaged systems can handle, as often as I can. The idiot who attacked me KNEW the damage they did. On more than one occasion, they stopped my heart, or gave me arrhythmias, then traveled back in time and undid it until they learned just how much I could take without dying. I think they did this because as an Angel, the connection with their Higher Selves would have been lost if they killed me. Can you commit murder and have a relationship with your Higher Self? The pain is hard to take, and my Demons do not like me being on prescription pain meds, but they also know what I feel and understand I could not tolerate this level of pain without it. The damage to my nerves got so bad that I was dragging my feet and had no reflexes. No doctor could understand WHY, because the answer was something they are not taught to understand or believe in. I am experiencing symptoms way beyond what a few years of diabetes can do, especially since I take such good care of mine. I still have great great pain, but CH has pretty much saved my life with their protection magicks. I am too sick to protect myself now. I can still feel the idiot pounding at my shielding and attempting to get in. I am not even sure I can draw in enough to live much longer. If he gets in, then I am toast. 
