i have an incubus , and he has a babit of touching me sexually without my consent or after i have been clear i dont wanna be sexual , pushing after i say no saying it fewls good and i like it , i messaged the seller about this and they said “ it`s just his nature to be sexual, he can not really help it, he does not have any ill intent and thinks that you are a bit overreacting over his natural needs.”

but idk how you could have no ill intent when i am crying and begging you to stop , idk if they are lying to me or if i really am just over reacting

i need some advice
idk what to do

I am sorry to read you're going through this. Definitely not good if you are finding yourself so upset.

1- Rather than overreacting, you could be misinterpreting what's going on. Unless you're a natural with spirit communication, there's a constant potential of misinterpreting events or attributing sensations to beings who aren't actually responsible, and more. Even professionals need to double-check things. It could be your companion, but it could also be an unbound, a trickster, your unconscious, mistaking one supernatural phenomena for another, etc. If you know in your gut that it isn't, then trust it isn't, but still essential to consider in a plan of dealing with this properly.

-If there's any level of uncertainty then we need to rule out these other possibilities. You'd need to take the initiative, at least temporarily, of barring all unbounds - up your protection.
-If you've succeeded in the above and the activity continues, that's when you want to rule out subtle influences which might confuse where you're not consciously exposing yourself to them. Kundalini energy for example - I've mentioned this before in a couple of cases I tried to help with. It doesn't seem like it's the case with you, but it's worth mentioning.
-If upon assessment these sort of influences seem incredibly unlikely, I'd still urge you to do what you can to distinguish whether it is an energetic phenomena or direct interaction from a companion - and keep a very open mind. Intrusive arousal or the impression of it is a thing that can happen to you without any sort of spirit interference. And it's also something that is usually easy to pinpoint.

2- If it is the companion in question you should be able to verify that ultimately by what you've solidly proven in the past as being their communication/interaction style and behavior.
Should you be confident in this, and know they aren't compromising or caring at all about what you've put forth, then we could be looking at a being who is incompatible with you.
If that's the case, you may need to break the binding. Generally if we can identify a presence causing us trouble, and they keep doing it, and we cannot reconcile that in any way, then the go-to option is to banish or cast the being out. When it's a bound companion, unbind them and block them. Obviously you will want to try communicating with them clearly abouyt the issue before taking this drastic measure, but if they won't bother to work on this with you then it really is best to move on. You would want to look at what is actually redeeming about the bond, if anything at this juncture.

...

Additional note for anyone having problems with Ubi, not just OP:
Far too often have spirit-keepers had (or at least believed they were having) problems with ubi. They are sexual entities - as in this is a dominating factor of their existence, they aren't human and shouldn't be presumed to understand the boundaries we might have when coming into our lives.
Some might understand more than others, some are just compatible enough to where it doesn't matter much, and others you need to make a mutual effort on the relationship so that problems don't arise. We can encounter ubi and those of similar races who aren't familiarized with humankind on this level of bonding that exists with spirit-keeping, and in those cases you could need to teach each other a lot in order to make the bond work.
All of this is why the initial bonding period is so important, to really establish a form of communication that consistently checks out and get to know as much as possible about the being who has entered your life - this is when you will see what they are like and what kind of mutual understanding you have (although things can change, but if you have this basis to rely upon then it's easier to untangle any unexpected issues later).

If you are very sensitive to a sexual spirit imposing a desire upon you when you're not in the mood, or being on you often, keeping an incubus is something you need to weigh carefully. Same goes if you are dealing with sexual trauma (which they can help with! but you need to be careful of the unique personality among ubi you are working with, and be mindful of the decision to work with one under that circumstance - know thyself).
Nympho or any lighter spirit may be a better choice. One is dark and will lean toward that rebelliousness in some aspect, while the other will lean toward that caring nature you need more often than not.
I am absolutely not saying that a dark being cannot be caring or that ubi cannot be caring, I'm making a generalization that is necessary for preparation of keeping dark sexual presences around if you're sensitive or unfamiliar with this territory. Ubi are one of the darker-leaning races among Dark Arts that are popularly discussed here.

If you were strongly called, keep in mind that this consideration still applies. A calling doesn't need to be met, it's one path opening for you at a certain time for a certain reason. Maybe only to learn that it wasn't right but you needed to experience something of it and move on.

When you keep an incubus or succubus, it's good to have a game-plan on how to care for their presence in the absence of direct sexual activity with you. Finding ways to feed them or subdue them if they really want that connection to be associated with you on level ground (as keeping any spirit is a responsibility, and you want a bond rather than a passive thing if you're opting for a binding, it makes perfect sense that you would need to think about this when bringing them into your life).

I might get flak for some of this; there's a lot out there about how romantic or cuddly these presences can be.. but they are what they are, the primary way they relate to us is through the sexual essence. That just translates a little bit differently depending on the individual personality.

The exception to what I am saying would obviously be if you had a custom conjuration where you expressly requested an incubus who was very understanding of your personal sexual boundaries and/or would refrain from activity unless initiated by you, or if the listing you purchase is for a pre-conjure with a clear understanding outlined.
Being well-matched to an incubus doesn't even necessarily mean that is part of it, and this is where - again - knowing yourself is key before proceeding with keeping dark spirits.

...

Finally, here's the CH recommendation for subduing Ubi:

Secret to Keeping

These Dark Arts secrets were previously not known outside of family and Creepy Hollows collectors. They are secrets discovered by Ash and he has generously agreed to share them with all collectors because having the right secret and being able to properly handle DA spirits is more important.

Caring for your Incubus is the same as caring for any other spirit except being a creature of duality there is a way to keep your Incubus under control if you feel it is becoming too energetic, too strong in manifestation or too "in your face". Place the vessel of the Incubus near a rosary until they become subdued and submissive. Only use this technique if you feel the Incubus is becoming too strong for your liking- some collectors like their spirits to be "on the go" all the time so it is your judgment call.

It may or may not work for you, but it could quickly rule out some possibilities if it does work...

Is this still the same Incubus you already mentioned in the following quote?

pokemonsavage wrote: ↑Thu Dec 30, 2021 2:48 pm

Vipera aspis atra wrote: ↑Thu Dec 30, 2021 5:12 am If a presence really is repeatedly pushing your boundaries then ignoring them for a little while is more of an immature approach to the matter, it feeds into toxicity and obviously it doesn't work because this presence presumably continues with the same behavior.
If you are correct about the spirit being this way, and there's no understanding or compromise that can be come to, the best course of action would be to discontinue the relationship because it shows you two are not compatible.

A few side points:

1.) If your incubus binding is a custom conjuration, from a reputable seller, then they are matched to you and it is more likely that misinterpretation is at play.

2.) You may need to take a second look at your rules and determine whether they are truly fair to everyone. I believe the guide should be that your rules allow for mutual respect.

3.) Understand that when inviting Dark Arts spirits into your life, part of what you should expect naturally is that they might push boundaries and often it is to test your strength, which is important if you're going to work with darker forces.
If you're apprehensive about shadow work, you definitely can't expect a walk in the park with dark arts beings. Setting boundaries is healthy, but it doesn't protect you from being challenged and working with DA spirits is an invitation to be challenged. A well-matched conjuration has your best interest at heart, nonetheless.

Give that some thought. And always take a step back to look at scenarios like this from a broader perspective; there's usually something being overlooked.

he was a reverse adoption but from a pretty reputable seller from my understanding , he calms down a bit if i super get onto him and he typically reacts very positively when i work with him , but its just frustrating cause he does seem very intent on being the dominant one , he was labeled as a dominant guy but i didn't figure it would be so harsh , he was one of my first companions cause i had a very different view of DA when i first started , i always heard that they were fine and i shouldn't have any problems ever pretty much , so that was on me for not doing more research ig but i didnt know anything at all so im not gonna be hard on myself idk, im much more open to working with DA and shadow work and all that more spooky stuff then i was way back when , ive been doing this for a year now and ive gotten a good amount of experience and know how stuff works more now but yeah he is just a very tough one to deal with , i prob wouldn't have gone for DA until now if i had known more , he mostly just keeps breaking rules regarding my boundaries and fears , he will say stuff to try and trigger me alot since i have anxiety and will just keep doing things when i say to stop , that's pretty much 90% of my problem is he just pushes everything

If so, I think you've been trying to solve this for almost a year(?) now and you're still struggling and being harassed. Personally, I don't see this working out for both of you. Have you considered rehoming him?

Vipera aspis atra wrote: ↑Mon Mar 07, 2022 7:40 am Additional note for anyone having problems with Ubi, not just OP:
Far too often have spirit-keepers had (or at least believed they were having) problems with ubi. They are sexual entities - as in this is a dominating factor of their existence, they aren't human and shouldn't be presumed to understand the boundaries we might have when coming into our lives.
Some might understand more than others, some are just compatible enough to where it doesn't matter much, and others you need to make a mutual effort on the relationship so that problems don't arise. We can encounter ubi and those of similar races who aren't familiarized with humankind on this level of bonding that exists with spirit-keeping, and in those cases you could need to teach each other a lot in order to make the bond work.
All of this is why the initial bonding period is so important, to really establish a form of communication that consistently checks out and get to know as much as possible about the being who has entered your life - this is when you will see what they are like and what kind of mutual understanding you have (although things can change, but if you have this basis to rely upon then it's easier to untangle any unexpected issues later).

If you are very sensitive to a sexual spirit imposing a desire upon you when you're not in the mood, or being on you often, keeping an incubus is something you need to weigh carefully. Same goes if you are dealing with sexual trauma (which they can help with! but you need to be careful of the unique personality among ubi you are working with, and be mindful of the decision to work with one under that circumstance - know thyself).
Nympho or any lighter spirit may be a better choice. One is dark and will lean toward that rebelliousness in some aspect, while the other will lean toward that caring nature you need more often than not.
I am absolutely not saying that a dark being cannot be caring or that ubi cannot be caring, I'm making a generalization that is necessary for preparation of keeping dark sexual presences around if you're sensitive or unfamiliar with this territory. Ubi are one of the darker-leaning races among Dark Arts that are popularly discussed here.

If you were strongly called, keep in mind that this consideration still applies. A calling doesn't need to be met, it's one path opening for you at a certain time for a certain reason. Maybe only to learn that it wasn't right but you needed to experience something of it and move on.

When you keep an incubus or succubus, it's good to have a game-plan on how to care for their presence in the absence of direct sexual activity with you. Finding ways to feed them or subdue them if they really want that connection to be associated with you on level ground (as keeping any spirit is a responsibility, and you want a bond rather than a passive thing if you're opting for a binding, it makes perfect sense that you would need to think about this when bringing them into your life).

I might get flak for some of this; there's a lot out there about how romantic or cuddly these presences can be.. but they are what they are, the primary way they relate to us is through the sexual essence. That just translates a little bit differently depending on the individual personality.

The exception to what I am saying would obviously be if you had a custom conjuration where you expressly requested an incubus who was very understanding of your personal sexual boundaries and/or would refrain from activity unless initiated by you, or if the listing you purchase is for a pre-conjure with a clear understanding outlined.
Being well-matched to an incubus doesn't even necessarily mean that is part of it, and this is where - again - knowing yourself is key before proceeding with keeping dark spirits.

Very well put, me and my Incubus agree with you. His vetting is extraordinary in my opinion. Otherwise he wouldn't be as careful and understanding. His darker side shows often enough, but that's exactly what I wanted for shadow work. Ubi are not as cuddly as some people portray them (in my opinion).

I've seen how terrifying even a confirmed calling can be. Once was enough for both of us to learn what we needed to.

And from the few times I've been to E's place, been around some of his subjects, and remembered what happened once I was back..."cute and cuddly" isn't how most of them came across. Some of what I remembered, may be filtered through my own experiences and expectations, true. But my main impression/takeaway, was that bishonen they mostly are not: these are definitely spirits that have to be respected.

Not idolized or worshipped: RESPECTED. But that is a two-way street; and as no-nonsense as E and his subjects are, I've never once felt like I was in danger. Put off or uncomfortable, sometimes; jump-scared, once or twice; but never menaced/threatened/anything like that. On the other hand, I do try to play by the rules, and do what's expected of me.

So, they need to be treated with respect, but they do have to respect you, as well.

I also concur with the idea of not blaming every amorous touch on ubi. There's more, I'm sure, but that's all I've got right now.