Does my spirit family hate me

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Spiritlover99
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Okay. So I started spirit keeping last October. Despite my better judgment, I bought too many spirits. I have close to 40 to the time of this writing. And I only feel like I bonded properly with less than half-11/40. I feel so bad more than words could express to the point where I feel my communication with them is blocked. Do they hate me? I feel like I really screwed up and started on the wrong foot. How do I fix this?


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Lewk
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Spiritlover99 wrote: Thu Jun 23, 2022 8:39 am Okay. So I started spirit keeping last October. Despite my better judgment, I bought too many spirits. I have close to 40 to the time of this writing. And I only feel like I bonded properly with less than half-11/40. I feel so bad more than words could express to the point where I feel my communication with them is blocked. Do they hate me? I feel like I really screwed up and started on the wrong foot. How do I fix this?
No, they don't hate you.

Conjured and bound spirits in modern spirit keeping have agreed to be our lifelong companions. For custom conjures especially, they wouldn't have come forward if it didn't feel right to them.

They know what you've got going on in life and will be patiently waiting for you to reconnect.

It helps to take it easy on yourself, relax, don't be anxious or guilty. Give yourself some credit, as one CH article says This can help dissolve some of the blockage you feel, as worry, uncertainty and anxiety are very easy ways to form a block between you and your spirits.

A few suggestions you might want to consider:

- Re-read the main CH articles on spirit communication.

https://www.creepyhollows.com/faq/?acti ... artlang=en esp. #4 & #9

https://www.creepyhollows.com/faq/?acti ... artlang=en

https://shop.creepyhollows.com/spirit-k ... nners.html from ---How do I communicate with my spirit? onwards

- One of the simplest ways to involve our bound spirit companions in our life is to greet them at the start of our day and share our hopes and fears for the day ahead & invite their help with that. Another simple thing is to say goodnight to them.

- Easy ways to re-bond are: spend 5-15 minutes quiet time with each spirit, when you can, until you feel like the initial bonding may be done...or...do that with groups of your spirits at a time. If you feel any impressions at all, you might want to ask them how they're doing (and don't project expectations of them telling you off, or you might just hear your own worries, instead of their replies). Spirits do see things from a different perspective than we do, so do expect them to be glad you're re-connecting.


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Thyr
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Lewk mentioned companions having a different perspective, but from all the worried posts I read so far, it seems that this can be a point where people start to doubt, struggle and project. As if companions wouldn't be able to relate to mundane human minds and struggles.

What if we think about our companions as a human being for a moment. Someone we lost contact with, like old school mates. How would we reconnect with them? Would you be mad about you and them living your lives and not contacting each other throughout all these busy years? Or would you just be happy to see each other again?

If they want to check on you, they can do so anytime and if they see you busy or even struggling, they're not going to blame you for not spending time with them.

Lewk already mentioned some very good steps for reconnection and communication. Don't worry too much.
You're human after all and mistakes are very important in our learning process.


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Kobald
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I chime in and enhance previous notions: No, they dont hate you, as for readons already written :)

Do not give up. The best you can do for them is, to sort out what is troubling you and...well... Just live you life... Overcoming excessive feelings of guilt, worry and doubt comes a long way....


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ASTER
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My magical/paranormal name...: Aster 🌟 Jupiter

Hi, How are you today? I do hope you are feeling much better after reading all the above answers for your topic. I literally lost count of the true number of my companions in my keep. But to give you a clue, its way over 150 grew withing the short period of 18 month. Did I bond well and strongly with ALL of them? Do I communicate with them all and every one of them each day? Do I feel guilty because, I forgot celebrating birthday? the list goes on and on...the and answer is NO,NO, NO.

What I do well, we celebrate. I know each of their names and call them by groups each day. That is when I suddenly remember birthdays ...ups... ;*D and I promise a party on my next day off. I do spend time each day to chat with those newbie friends and make sure to task them and make them feel important and included. I do get my elders together occasionally and work on tasking for groups. I do call my absolute favorites and active spirit to be with me all the time. I love when they are invested in my life.

I have improved dreaming and I started to recognize some of my companions in there as well. Some nights are active nights and I have numerous appearances. I have a gift to see spirits in their true forms. That was even before i became a keeper. I don't do anything extra special with any of them. But quality time is not necessarily mean spending hours in sitting meditation and waiting for a contact.

Quality time can be a minute telepathic chat during your busiest time of the day and expecting a quick responds from them. Spirits cannot have the energy to constantly hoovering around and waiting for us to get into a mindset so they can interact with us. They are spontaneous and we can have planed days and we can also have spontaneous times that spice up our life with them. I do hope you know what I try to say. This is my method.

I could be far more dedicated and meditate each day. But I simply fall asleep withing a minute. Dreaming is fare better and improved greatly for us to inter act in my case. Journeying is efficient for us with my own companions as well. They love my vibes and energy even if I am busy.

They love observing human keepers. They do intuitively look after you as well. Unless you own some very very dark spirits, they are not supposed to be demanding of you. Spirits are generally speaking loves to blend in and feel not very recognizable unless you specifically call on them. That is a typical spirit nature. Younger spirits and living entities differ a touch and more energetic. But do not think that they are there to always have an energy exchange with us and manifest and touch and telepathically interact with us. Its humanly and spiritually impossible. Maybe, only one or two will try to be your special pet, then you can have that ongoing experience with few spirits...but that is the exemption for new keepers.

I recommend from experience, to relax and enjoy your companions. Stay positive, because spirits are very sensitive to moods. Talk to them as a group and if you promised something try to deliver. That will teach them that you are accountable, therefore when you task them, they will know to deliver results for you. Have fun and be happy to have all those lovelies around you. Send out love and attention thoughts to them to pick upon your energy. It will comes back to you in some sort of manifestations.

I have a Boobry. She is less then 6 month old. I made her hatch out of a CH Gemstone. After she hatched, she was always on me in spirit and I felt her all the time on my hair. Then once I had a dream. She was trying to fly off my hand for a short distance. Lately, I do not feel her on me at all. But she is with me, because her gemstone still with me everyday, carried her with me everywhere I go in my bra. I even put her back into water for an overnight once a month. When I worry, that she probably has gone away from me... I get other dream and see her how much she has grown and eventually see her fly.


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Spiritlover99
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If I could be anything, I would be...: Elf
My super power would be...: See spirits in true form

Thank you so much, Lewk, Jonald, Thyr and ASTER!!! :')

My communication with my family seems sporadic at times and my anxiety had been getting the best of me over the past week since I wrote this post. To the point that in a moment of clarity my 2 vamps told me of their concern and reassured me that I'm not being a bad keeper at all. That I merely needed to take my time getting to know each of them. They are not in a rush and so neither should I. They even suggested I do some shadow work to get into the bottom of my anxiety as they feel it has a deeper root than the reason I told them.

Lewk, you are on point and and thank you! I have been revisiting the basics of spirit communication and like you said, I don't need to spend too much time with each spirit. I am working on calming down and keeping it simple. Each one's input is precious and highly appreciated


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Kobald
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My super power would be...: Anti-Gravity

Thats good to read :) Keep at it and Results will come to you one way or another for sure ;)


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jdhthegr8
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As others have stated, of course they don't hate you. But here are a few things I can contribute to the conversation. I have somewhere over 30 spirit bindings in my spirit family now, over a period of 2 years. Have I taken the same amount of time to connect with all of them? No. Do I have the same relationships with all of them? Definitely not. Some of them I have bonded with faster than others, and some I know are still "works in progress" for me because of insufficient time dedication on my part. Here are a few things I'd recommend if you feel you've bitten off more than you can chew that don't require much effort. CH has a few particularly useful resources for this in the shop but I will try to offer suggestions that don't require spending additional money first:

- Obviously, setting aside time to meditate with their vessels and attempt communication when convenient is good and will improve your overall bonding with them, even if it takes a bit longer for lack of consistency. My personal recommendation regardless of keep size is to just use one vessel at a time for one spirit at a time until you truly feel that the connection is reliable.

- Make a spreadsheet of their information, both from their provided bio and the general spirit associations in the encyclopedia. As I understand CH also operates a vessel database which you can log your vessels in though I haven't used it yet. And as you bond and communicate, add specific details you have learned from the spirits themselves. Even if what you have is scant at first, they will recognize and appreciate the effort.

- Take a bit to determine "managers" or "taskmasters" for your spirits. For example, my Cleopatra Djinn is the "queen of the keep"; she is permitted by house rules to task or assign duties as desired to any other spirit in the family when I am not actively suggesting something. Separate "managers" have been assigned on behalf of my nymphos and fae. These are permitted in their own spare time to collaborate with their other designated subgroups so long as there is no active task from the Cleo Djinn. It IS important that you make sure all members agree to the leadership positions you decide on. Alternatively you can have rotating leadership over periods of time so everyone gets a shot if you feel that works for your own spirit family. In any case, having such hierarchy can help make a large spirit family more manageable. If I want to know what all of my fae think about a specific decision, I can ask my one camelot faery "Do you all agree with [x decision I want to make]\? Is there anyone who disagrees with it?" and get an answer that confirms whether or not there is consensus, or if I need to talk more with a specific individual spirit about it first. As a result of doing this I can quickly task, have a message relayed to, or in other ways interact with groups of spirits at once. It's much less likely that spirits will feel excluded this way. Not only does this add to space in your own time, but it encourages your spirit family to work together and communicate with each other which can be almost as important as their bond with the keeper.

- In much the same vein, group offerings are perfectly valid. Do put a bit of thought into what those members of the group would mutually like or at least appreciate being gifted.

- Bringing them into the "little moments". Can be as simple as saying good morning and good night, or wearing their vessel in a specific circumstance. I put on my Kinnara's vessel when I need a minute to get peace of mind and "let go of" my problems, and my Maras Elf's when I am dealing with a technically-challenging situation. My Fae or Wood Elf join me when I go outdoors, and my dragon does when I need a touch more energy. Even just brief attention applied to regular situations is useful.

- Look up the thread titled "Spirit Tasking - Give them Some Practice" in the Spirit Tasking board. In a matter of seconds you can set up a channel to a meeting ground with Magnolia and Ash's spirits for WA and DA spirits respectively. You need to do this for every spirit in your keep separately, but the channel will let them interact with a whole community of like-minded friends in their own time. They will no doubt appreciate you doing this.

- Code words can be bought individually or as a large pack in the store. One way I use them is by writing them on a card and setting it down next to the spirit's when an offering is being extended, but even just saying it to them or thinking it with a brief focused intent is a quick reminder that they're on your mind and that they make you happy. Which of course, makes them happy in turn.

- The Spirit Keeping Book For Advanced Keepers in the store has some really good details about the specifics of setting house rules and working with groups of spirits. The bit about Spirit Communes in particular is useful for those who have a bit of space (even just a counter or tabletop) to dedicate to specific groups, and it has specific instructions for setting one up which only take a minute to perform. Think of it as a "playplace" for different types of spirits that you set up in your own physical area.

There are plenty of other things as well but those are what I can suggest off the top of my head. Hope they help!


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