I am one who believes that one should act in the moment to resolve things, rather than waiting for them to culminate and bring everything to the fore at once --which can in turn be problematic in and of itself.ninjalovergirl wrote:Did anyone just see those last few pages (and also other digs at me), and that, by actually coming out and talking about it, instead of ignoring it and still having the tension still present, it solved the tension and arguments between people? Instead of just leaving it be, and being tense, and not knowing why? In other words, by digging up the past, it worked.
Most issues have been dealt with as they come up, which is why they are in the past. Many things have actually been resolved, and to refer to them as a collective is faulty. To bring forth negative examples of the past which have been addressed, doesn't do much but to keep us in the past..and what we want to do is move forward.
So if you're talking recent issues, certainly, it makes sense..but even so, I am of the view they should be dealt with directly, individually, head on to make an example. Lead by example. An announcement like this is fine and well, but the changes come from action and more people respond to action. I know there is good intent behind this post, but I don't feel it is the most active solution to the issues you perceive.
Just go forward and put to practice what you're preaching, this stimulates positive growth.
There have been calls for peace before by many members here; and I as well as others have talked about the nature of opinions.
As I've stated, this has not been neglected..there is no avoidance of negativity. We as a forum have worked through these instances numerous times. If they hadn't been worked through, there wouldn't be the overall positive experience most are actually having; there wouldn't have been advancement in any sense.
I am not discounting the perceptions of those who may feel negatively about where the forum is at, as you must feel that way for a reason; but I do think that it's more personal rather than this widespread issue.
I think that individuals, such as yourself ninjalover, must be feeling mistreated..and certainly that must be gotten to the bottom of..but I would not say CH is a mess, I would not say CH is in a bad state.
I think these views are the result of a few individually bad experiences that paint all surrounding in the same negative light, when they could likely have been alleviated if a greater awareness and understanding from all directions was achieved -- of how each individual feels, and the nature of all contributing aspects. And I think those individuals need to speak up at the time they feel they are being wronged; this should be encouraged.
I'm not ignoring the past; I'm simply not letting it rule my life. Everyone has to move on and deal with the present. And if something of the past is still causing an issue in the present, it should be rather obvious. This isn't obvious to everybody, so everybody does not feel the way that you do; and therefore it is not a problem for the entire community.ninjalovergirl wrote:You cannot ignore the past, it is still on this board, and in every member here.
It still lingers, even I could feel it, but didn't understand it. It just felt horrible. Not somewhere that is easy to be.
CH is supposed to be a place where I feel safe, can come and relax, but it isn't even close, and isn't even over. You cannot just say this is the internet, it is dismissing the problems that were never there before. if it was a better place before, there is a lot of room for improvement, and I am trying to help. But if you don't even want to try to understand the concerns of others here, form a different point of view to your own, then so be it. I am saying it now, it's totally different, and not a step in the right direction.
You want CH to be a place where you can relax. And that is fine, many people like CH for it's friendly and comforting atmosphere.. but conflict is everywhere. That it turns up here is just life. There are many rules/guidelines in place to combat damage in this community, but that conflict comes up at all is completely natural when you are allowing people from all walks of life to freely express themselves in coexistence.
I do not see how I am dismissing any problems. I don't see the problems you do. Rather, you may be dismissing the role that technology plays in these problems in reacting so to my statement. I think all factors are important to consider, in coming to a more complete understanding of why things are the way they are.
I think I'm pretty open to the concerns of others. I think I've been here a long time, and I have been consistently active, and I have taken action to mediate and alleviate the issues that arise. I care about the community and invest a lot of myself into keeping this place going in the right direction, as well as evolving. So do others here.
I find it increasingly offensive that you appear to be choosing to believe that nobody cares or is doing anything of worth, just because they don't feel quite as you do.
And it's pretty clear in my response above, that I do care about your concerns and anyone else who may be having a bad experience on the forum.
My final point is; many of us are and have been actively working to shape this place, to keep it at it's best for the era we are in. Some aspects are out of our hands; relative perception is out of our hands; and this can mean negativity arises every so often..but it's a hell of a lot better than you'll find at any other forum and that much is always maintained.
That it is maintained, takes a lot of care on the part of the owners, mods, and passionate members of the board. This forum is not going downhill; there are changes in the atmosphere but they are neutral -- you must take responsibility for your own experience, and outlook, just as much as any of us can do what is in our power to be welcoming and make sure your rights are respected.
That is all I will say on this matter.