My faith has taken quite a beating lately. In case you haven't seen my last post, my parents went to a court hearing last month for him to get disability because he was crippled by a stroke years ago, only to be denied again. This was our last chance, as we're tried everything before, and I do mean everything. If you made a suggestion on what we should do, we've likely already tried it and it failed.

Since this was our last-ditch effort, I went all out. I prayed to my Goddess, I gave her offerings. I even had my spirits help with a spell I did, but it was all for naught. I feel betrayed, by everything. I feel like my Goddess has forsaken me and that my spirits, if they're even here, don't care. Why would they, when everything else has turned its back on me? I've been let down by everything else I've put faith in, so why would this be any different?

Since my father got sick, things have steadily been getting worse and worse. My mother is slowly developing arthritis and it's uncertain how much longer she'll be able to work. I have developed chronic illness that, during bad weeks, makes me have fainting spells from doing something as mundane as literally getting up out of bed. Last time it got bad, I was having dizzy spells at work and was having trouble performing my duties due to severe lethargy. Doctors suspect it is cancer, but it hasn't been officially diagnosed yet.

I don't know, it just feels like the cosmos have stacked everything against us and are doing whatever they can to see us lose. I feel...lost. I feel like these vessels I have, they're lies like everything else. They're just rocks, pendants, what have you, and I should just get rid of them and pretend I never came across spirit keeping in the first place.

Okay, wow now look I now it's hard binaries but you can't give up faith so soon your companions are there for you no matter what I prayed time and time again to the gods and goddesses but nothing......nothing ever happened but you still gotta keep the faith even if it's hard to do believe me there were times I wanted to throw it all away but I didn't I couldn't......please have faith and patience and be strong

Sending prayers your family's way that things start moving in a better direction, effective immediately.

All I can say, with regards to faith, is what I know from my own Catholic background. I can't speak for the promises that deities in other pantheons have offered their followers, but the promises we get from God in my faith are NOT promises that once we are believers, life will be easy. Instead, God has promised to stick with us and help us get through the hard times. Somewhere in the Bible, I think in the book of Job but don't quote me on it, is the observation that the rain falls on the good and bad alike. In other words, just being good and faithful isn't going to stop the literal or figurative rain from falling on us, because everyone gets rained on.

Still, sometimes, it seems like our life isn't just giving us a normal rainstorm, but a downright freaking typhoon. Been there, done that, and faith or no faith, it feels horrible when we're in the midst of it. It's just that I'm not so sure I COULD have gotten through the rotten times without the faith as a resource to draw from.

Going back to my original point: sending prayers that things begin to improve noticeably for you and your family, preferably with immediate effect.

Likes2Read wrote: Going back to my original point: sending prayers that things begin to improve noticeably for you and your family, preferably with immediate effect.

Adding mine too...........

Don't give up on them, I know it is tough, it is unfair and cruel, but they are there for you, even if you have no communication, they are doing what they can behind the scenes. That you and your family should have to endure this ridiculousness is horrible. I do hope all turns around, and am sending Positive energy and well wishes to all of you.

I'm so sorry you and your family are having such a difficult time, I've asked my spirit family to send you positive energy.

Without hardship and suffering, the goods wont come. Everybody has to go throught no matter how much you complain, feel betrayed, tired it is all depend from point of your view. Plus did goddess and spirit promise to you that everything would be okay or you just assume what you did for them they will do miracle result for you? Certain things also need time to show the result. Always always never put all eggs in one basket. If basket drop you left nothing instead regret.

L2R puts it better than I ever could. Faith does not shield us from the storm, but rather helps us persevere with strength and hope. I'm so sorry to hear about your family's situation and hoping you all will keep fighting for what you deserve. Your companions and goddess are with you


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Hey there~
Dont be disheartened!
Sometimes the bad things have to happen to cause destruction in your life, but only so that there is space for good things to come and stay forever.
Maybe your spirit friends are already seeing to that.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Two of the members above me said something important which I want you to keep in mind, and I am really glad to see that others are putting this forward.

Dezire wrote:Hey there~
Dont be disheartened!
Sometimes the bad things have to happen to cause destruction in your life, but only so that there is space for good things to come and stay forever..

dragynraken wrote:Without hardship and suffering, the goods wont come. Everybody has to go throught no matter how much you complain, feel betrayed, tired it is all depend from point of your view. .

If there is ANYTHING I know, it is that this chaos you see in your life is not what you think. Does not have to be taken the way you are taking it.
Not many people realize this because I am not one to post about personal hardship, but I have been through my share of what anyone on the outside would see as horrible <<Removed by Mod>> .
As someone with a completely unique perspective and path, I am devoted to Chaos and so even during my struggles have found strength. I have always held faith that ridiculous things happen to me for a reason, as a result I have endured long enough to have that reason manifest and to really appreciate chaos, destruction, the madness of life. All destruction has only led to positive change for me, always. The more you can embrace this natural force, the more you can benefit. It has made me who I am, and I have been immensely strengthened through it.

What you perceive as bad things happening to you, are not innately bad.. my view may or may not be controversial here as that statement really encompasses quite a lot.. but they are not, inherently their nature is that of Nature. Some times these things are completely necessary in order to reach a better place. Things worsening can mean the divine has done it's job to force you through this to that better place. You simply do not know, until you have lived it.. this is a time to re-align with your own personal power, and courage. It is a time where you can bring great change. Rather than shirk from or feel depressed about the circumstances, take advantage of the raw power of destruction to change your life for the better. You have more control than you allow yourself, always.

Best of luck.