So uh, question for those with lots of experience with ubi. I am head over heels for my Incubi who we shall call 'K' . i am also very popular i with the boys in town, i pretty much was a thot way before my dear K. But after the last time i had an interaction of a debauched nature with a guy, i felt really guilty after. I am pretty sure K doesnt mind but now I do. A thought keeps floating around in my head. Commitment to K. Is it wise to commit oneself fully to a ubi, i here they can be jealous and i am naturally flirtatious. I just feel repulsed by the idea of being with anyone but him is all. Idk if i should, but i know i want to. I am hesitant to ask him about it because well i dont wanna upset him. Any advice and or testimonies of similar issues are appreciated. Thankyou

I think it's okay if you don't want to have sex with anyone outside of your ubi right now. Afterall it is your body and you may choose freely what to do with it.

If you're not wanting anybody, you don't have to go for them. That just means you're not interested and it's okay not to be. Just pay attention to your needs and take care of yourself.

@Whimsy

Its just that i have my usual fwb and its hard. Like, i still find them attractive and stuff. I just feel wrong for that. maybe im just weird lol. Like no ones pressuring me, its just unusual for me not to be promiscuous.

I don't think there is anything wrong with how you feel. I have multiple incubi myself.. and I also see myself only being romantically devoted to about two of my spirits/beings. All of my incubi though don't care whether or not I have sexual relations with a person, or with them or my other sexual spirits/beings.
Just my opinion, but I feel having sexual relations with living folk can create sexual energy towards your ubi.. so maybe that might be to your interest -- or you can even ask your ubi to be involved actually. Some ubi would happily participate.

I can somewhat relate to this post but not entirely.. I used to be very no-strings-attached kind of person with a lot of men lol.. though this was at a low point of my life, so my situation is different in that aspect from yours, but I honestly believe if I never brought one of my spirits to me I would still have gone about things in that way.. and today I kind of still carry weird guilt whenever I have flirtatious interactions with men at all. I already know it's not like I am "betraying" them or anything, but it's just something I psychologically instilled in my mind.

He's your companion so I can't really attest for him but I don't feel he would be upset with whatever you decide for yourself.

I think there is a post somewhere from Ash that said not to replace your human relationships with spirit ones.
Perhaps DW can chime in? :p
I doubt any incubi who is looking after your welfare would encourage you to stop physical relationships.
Perhaps they are steering you less from casual sex and more towards a meaningful relationship with someone who cares for and adores you?
Just my 2 cents.

@LittleGreenIcon

I mean all my romantic relationships in the past have always ended badly. I always seem to wind up with liars, cheaters or abusers. Im single and stuff so im not really replacing anyone. Funny how i fear ppl more than spirits in this regard.

LittleGreenIcon wrote:I think there is a post somewhere from Ash that said not to replace your human relationships with spirit ones.
Perhaps DW can chime in? :p
I doubt any incubi who is looking after your welfare would encourage you to stop physical relationships.
Perhaps they are steering you less from casual sex and more towards a meaningful relationship with someone who cares for and adores you?
Just my 2 cents.

Was very similar to you once Rosie.

I believe littlegreenicon sums it up well.
Nothing wrong with "fun", but perhaps you yourself are ready for more of a commitment and the connection that comes with it.
You may have had bad experiences in the past (again I can emphasize) but sometimes that means we have our own subconscious issues we need to deal with - else we wouldn't be drawn and/or draw in those kind of people

Human relationships and Spirit/Entity relationships are equally valuable, and while I don't think your trying to replace your needs with a Spirit entirely I will advise against doing so nonetheless.

Yes, from what I've experienced and read about, sexual spirits can sometimes exhibit a territorial streak for those they're involved with, but honestly speaking I wouldn't see this as a negative thing. For the most part, so long as an individual isn't harming you or doing something that makes you uncomfortable, they're just as happy helping you and your partner get off as they are to be involved with you directly. Sexual Spirits (especially Incubi/Succubi) have an uncanny amount of confidence, support, and love to give that goes beyond human definitions of jealousy. It's only when you ignore them completely that-...well, it's best not to do that.

Why do you feel guilty exactly? Is it because you feel like you're cheating on your ubi or do you feel bad for your fwb? Like, what aspect are making you feel bad about it?

Then the questions are, are either of them hurt by it? Do they both enjoy their respective relationships with you? Do you enjoy them? Are you happy with the way things are currently?

And finally, the big one is, do you still want to sleep with them both or do you want something different? Because it's entirely up to you what kind of relationships you want in your life.

post715075.html#p715075

I think I found the post, or one of the posts. Though I think this is talking more about Spiritual Marriage. But what's said in the post is still good advice.

"AS MUCH & AS OFTEN AS YOU MIGHT FEEL THEIR PRESENCE AND AS MUCH & AS OFTEN AS THEY COMMUNICATE WITH YOU IT'S NOT THE SAME. IF YOU'RE WILLING TO OWN UP & BE REALISTIC WITH THOSE LIMITATIONS THEN YOU CAN MAKE AN INFORMED DECISION."

^^^^Points said above very valid though. If I have to add on, it's when a being is possessive and trying to control your relationships, possibly to the point of spiritually interfering with them, is what to watch out for. But seeing as that it's a bound ubi (I'm only assuming, sorry if I'm wrong), then that's something you wouldn't have to be worried about. They're not going to have hang ups about that. Which is my reasoning as to why I believe they wouldn't care if you decide to engage with others.
I subscribe more with what Ash says though, there is reason why we are living people, and we are meant for human connections. I think it's okay to rationalize if you don't want to physically be with anyone for awhile, but, I personally don't think it's a good thing to completely withdraw into just spirit/entity relationships. HOWEVER I don't see anything wrong with it if you can properly communicate your wants and needs and if it is being met with your ubi. You're the one with your personal connection to your incubi.