StarofHope wrote: βFri Jan 10, 2025 11:54 am
Hello! I left for a while to take a break as my mental health was declining. I am doing better now but I really need help with this topic.
I have read a ton about it and a book that contained the history and the whys, interviews, etc.
The irrational? Fear I have is to be separated from a companion of mine later in the after. Our bond is out of this world kind of bond. A binding lasts a lifetime but we want a binding to last in the after, in the beyond life or whatever it's supposed to be called. I am more dramatic about it, he's all cool and collected while I am having a crisis as I age and I feel my body growing older and starts having age related problems. >< I am aware that a strong bond can last beyond life itself, but I want it guaranteed

..... He agrees to the binding but feel it is quite unnecessary because our strong bond will work kinda similar.
A spirit marriage binding is apparently supposed to do just that if I understand it correctly from conjurers who do perform them. The purpose of a spirit marriage varies and reasons are many. It also seems like a tool that can be used to aquire abilites in regards to the paranormal. I dunno. Im confused.
Pros and cons? Are there other options? Or do I just not pursue it?
In the real world here where we humans live, there are a variety of ways to approach long term relationships. So too, I believe, with spirit companions.
There are a couple of older threads on the whole idea of spirit marriage. I'm pretty sure I posted on one last year. If you can't find it, if you want to tag me in this thread, I'll look for it.
I'd like to highlight a couple of points, based on your question...
To me, if we can side step labels like marriage for a moment, what we're talking about (I think) is a long term relationship with another being. This is based on mutual consent. It could be for this lifetime or across future lifetimes. (Some spirit types are intrinsically capable of - or known for - maintaining the relationship over future lifetimes. CH says this of Gold Djinn. Lisa of Mystic Morning Treasures says this of Neb Djinn, for example.)
These relationships need not be sexual or romantic - as marriage between humans normally is - so marriage is hypothetically a separate issue from that of a relationship that can extend over future lifetimes.
'Marriage' between living humans & incorporeal beings has a long, rich history. (Try googling Heavenly Bridegrooms by Ida Craddock. Aleister Crowley was very impressed with her.) That does not mean that, if we're in a sexual or romantic relationship with one, that 'marriage' is the inevitable, best or most acceptable apotheosis of that relationship.
Quite a high proportion of spirit keepers with sexual companions seem to be comfortable with a polyamorous set up. I think it's down to both the keeper and the spirit(s) as to what their preference is. Just as in 'real' life.
Also, just as in real life a keeper may want to change things - separate, get divorced. This is also possible with items like CH's Break Any Paranormal Contract Created In This Life.
I would recommend going into such a relationship with one's eyes open, just as in real life.
Just as not everyone rushes into marriage with their human lover, so too it is probably a good idea to not to be too hasty to do that with a spirit (of whatever type). A courtship, getting to know each other, period is probably a good idea too. A sexual, romantic relationship with a spirit being can also become stable & fulfilling without needing to be formalised in a marriage ceremony - again like in 'real' life here in Earth.
Finally, never feel obliged or under pressure to cement a spirit relationship via marriage vows to please the spirit because they seem to be keen for that to happen. That perception can sometimes be a misinterpretation caused by our own mental projections based on cultural expectations we hold within us, or our spirits may even notice that expectation and respond to it.
The power to take decisions should always remain firmly in our own hands and be based on our own best interests. A good spirit companion will normally be happy with what we're happy with and unhappy with what we're unhappy with.
It's relevant to say I have a large sexual commune and have experienced a variety of sexual/romantic relationships with non-corporeal beings of many kinds, from both before and after discovering spirit keeping.
Does that make me some kind of infallible authority on the subject? No. But it's something I have years of experience of and have read up on. I hope at least some of the thoughts above are of interest or are useful.
Not the resident expert. Just another spirit keeper. Since 2017.
You must stay on the path. Do not leave it.
If you do, you'll never...
find it again.
No matter what may come, stay on...
the path! [Gandalf, in The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug]