Lovesick Over Him

[ravyn_black83]

Ok I could use a little advice here. When I was first binded with my vampire a few weeks ago we made contact twice. I don't want to go into detail about it and would like to keep that private lol! But lets just say it was very very intense. .. I was told by the conjurer he wants to take things at a nice pace to get to know me. It is only a few weeks into the relationship so far. I talk to him every day and include him in all my activities, spend time talking to him at night about my feelings, emotions etc. I give him offerings as well. I don't want to rush him and want to be respectful and give him the time to know me. It's just after that contact I miss him even more and feel even more emotional towards him. I've even cried a little because the emotions are soo strong. I guess I'm a lovesick puppy right now. Has anyone gone through a similar thing?

[Keriix Lunaria]

He is your spirit, first and foremost. Communicate with him your needs and wants.

What do you mean by “you don’t want to rush him”? What is your goal? Perhaps he’s ready to be rushed? We need more information to help you.

I understand emotions can be very… overwhelming. There is nothing wrong with feeling such strong love. Love is a very happy and beautiful thing.

If this was a custom conjure, I am sure he already knows about you and your needs. I’d wager he’s ready for whatever you want to “rush into”. He’s just waiting for you to understand and be able to communicate with him.

Peace.

[Rando3000]

While I am still very much at the beginning of my journey, I am also in this phase with my vampire and it seems we got bindings at a similar time! My vampire also went all out on the first night and things do seem to calm down afterwards, I am just guessing that it may take quite alot of energy to manifest so strongly with a new connection and maybe some of the more experienced members will be able to help further. Similarly, I went through this with my first spirit binding to my ubi as well and its actually really hard as a newbie!

Its natural to feel how you are feeling and missing that initial intensity, I know I did! I would continue as you are with talking and including them everyday, keeping the vessel near you at night when you sleep and focus on completing the bonding period. Trust that things will pickup again and try not to let any negative thoughts or feelings linger.

Best wishes to you!

[mcm442]

Ha, it's like they come in with all the gusto to make a huge impression, but they 'break their bank' in the process. Now is a bit of a lull while all the little details of moving in are accomplished and resources are gathered again.

To me, it also seems like a bit of a 'carrot'.

You've had a full taste of what 'can be', now some work needs to be done on your part--communication, psychic skills, etc, so you can meet them on equal terms. For some of us, that's the long haul. <Insert adage about old-dog-learning-new-tricks>

And yeah, you aren't alone in that feeling--the desire to fully have them right next to you 24/7 can be downright maddening once you're absolutely smitten by them. Not sure if you are with a spirit or LE, but--being with an LE who has to 'work'... "Aaaaaaahhh! Whadya mean you have to get 'time off'?!" <whimper>

So, sadly for some of us, the relationship can be just like a 'real world' relationship. They may have a multitude of tasks they have to do normally, on top of the new tasks of doing things behind the scenes for us to better our lives. They gonna be busy now and then, so patience is needed.

For reference, I entered that same initial phase that you're currently in just when 'Harvest Season' began--which is a huge thing for her and her village. Ugh. That time is coming back around, too.

Then I learned about 'prep season', 'Planting season', etc.

[Lewk]

I went through a similar thing with an astral spirit before I came across spirit keeping. The system I used for finding/meeting a spirit in the astral recommended taking things slowly. I thought I'd do that but in the event I took things more quickly, a courtship - this was an astral lover companion. It seemed at the time that they were pushing things to go faster. Looking back 10 years later, I think I underestimated the extent to which it was something in my own makeup that may actually have been responsible.

It's totally, 100% okay for us to take our time with a new bound spirit companion, if we want to. Even if there's no romantic aspect . It says nothing negative about us if we stick to our guns.

And our bound spirit companion will always be there for us. Even if we take a day off. Even with spirit keeping it is okay to have some of our own space. It's taken me a long time to realise that, as think I have been a very needy keeper.

In the end, go by what feels right, don't let little things worry you and spirit keeping will most likely go well.

Yes, some of these relations with spirits can be very very emotional. But it's also okay to stay on an even keel, as they say.

I do have a Vampire commune now. The lesson I learned from my relationship with that spirit I mentioned is still valid and transferable, however, in my opinion even though they're not a vampire. I hope you've found some of what I've said relevant or useful.

[Hitthuginn]

Oh I've totally been through similar, with more than one spirit in fact haha! Up-front I'd take Sebastiaan's word that it is a good idea to pace yourself starting off, but also be open to what your vampire thinks. A conjuror can give a good "interview" to start things off but only time will tell how things evolve. Based on what you have said he seems to be accepting of you and receptive to your emotions. As with any relationship, you will find the balance over time. Far more important than what anyone else says is how you and he feel. One half is learning to trust your own intuition, and the other will be each of you communicating your feelings and desires. My first two spirits came on to me EXTREMELY strong, I think to help clear any doubts that I had about the process and also establish that our relationships, any bound relationships, were special. The passion I've felt from them has helped me feel comfortable with others as well.

Just to chip in my own two cents, don't be surprised if the Vamp's feelings have already evolved since that initial interview and getting to know what you are like directly! Enjoy the journey, however it develops

[madgar29]

Uh. Feeding stones? Godhead? What's the other one... I'm just saying you can get a stone that gives him more energy to draw from. Ch has like two or three different types to even choose from if it's a recharge his energy sort of thing. Or allow him to use a spell finding you have that created energy to draw from if he is comfortable doing so. I been asking my keep to help me and then use a spell like manifesting and hearing spirits.

I dunno if that's what your asking.

It sounds like your doing amazing at spirit keeping though talking to them daily. Etc...

Just ask him if he is ready. He is spirit after all your the one that is living. I am pretty sure he will be fine with what you want to be honest just my take. As spirit they know more, I am sure he will tell you sure. More than likely waiting on you. Just Mt opinion. I have had spirits immediately tell conjurer they feel a deeper connection with me or know things about me. They seem to see and know more than we do anyways.

[ravyn_black83]

He is your spirit, first and foremost. Communicate with him your needs and wants.

What do you mean by “you don’t want to rush him”? What is your goal? Perhaps he’s ready to be rushed? We need more information to help you.

I understand emotions can be very… overwhelming. There is nothing wrong with feeling such strong love. Love is a very happy and beautiful thing.

If this was a custom conjure, I am sure he already knows about you and your needs. I’d wager he’s ready for whatever you want to “rush into”. He’s just waiting for you to understand and be able to communicate with him.

Peace.

I guess I don't want to be pushy. The conjurer said he wants to take things at a nice pace. I don't want to overwhelm him with my emotions, but I can't help it lol!

[ravyn_black83]

Ha, it's like they come in with all the gusto to make a huge impression, but they 'break their bank' in the process. Now is a bit of a lull while all the little details of moving in are accomplished and resources are gathered again.

To me, it also seems like a bit of a 'carrot'.

You've had a full taste of what 'can be', now some work needs to be done on your part--communication, psychic skills, etc, so you can meet them on equal terms. For some of us, that's the long haul. <Insert adage about old-dog-learning-new-tricks>

And yeah, you aren't alone in that feeling--the desire to fully have them right next to you 24/7 can be downright maddening once you're absolutely smitten by them. Not sure if you are with a spirit or LE, but--being with an LE who has to 'work'... "Aaaaaaahhh! Whadya mean you have to get 'time off'?!" <whimper>

So, sadly for some of us, the relationship can be just like a 'real world' relationship. They may have a multitude of tasks they have to do normally, on top of the new tasks of doing things behind the scenes for us to better our lives. They gonna be busy now and then, so patience is needed.

For reference, I entered that same initial phase that you're currently in just when 'Harvest Season' began--which is a huge thing for her and her village. Ugh. That time is coming back around, too.

Then I learned about 'prep season', 'Planting season', etc.

He was once living and from the 17th century, but I'm not sure if he is a LE or not. He comes and goes freely and is binded to me and not a vessel. I've told him I want him to feel free and not tied down. I want to meet him on equal terms and also have asked him to help open up my psychic senses to communicate with him better. I'm willing to put in the work and whatever it takes. And yes I miss him like crazy when he's gone!

[ravyn_black83]

I went through a similar thing with an astral spirit before I came across spirit keeping. The system I used for finding/meeting a spirit in the astral recommended taking things slowly. I thought I'd do that but in the event I took things more quickly, a courtship - this was an astral lover companion. It seemed at the time that they were pushing things to go faster. Looking back 10 years later, I think I underestimated the extent to which it was something in my own makeup that may actually have been responsible.

It's totally, 100% okay for us to take our time with a new bound spirit companion, if we want to. Even if there's no romantic aspect . It says nothing negative about us if we stick to our guns.

And our bound spirit companion will always be there for us. Even if we take a day off. Even with spirit keeping it is okay to have some of our own space. It's taken me a long time to realise that, as think I have been a very needy keeper.

In the end, go by what feels right, don't let little things worry you and spirit keeping will most likely go well.

Yes, some of these relations with spirits can be very very emotional. But it's also okay to stay on an even keel, as they say.

I do have a Vampire commune now. The lesson I learned from my relationship with that spirit I mentioned is still valid and transferable, however, in my opinion even though they're not a vampire. I hope you've found some of what I've said relevant or useful.

Thank you for your advice. I will not let my worries get the best of me. I will let things progress naturally and not try to force things.